In "Staying True" by Jenny Sanford, the Palmetto State's first lady provides such intimate perspective into her and the governor's long marriage that readers may sympathize for both parties.

Among the insights shown is that, in their early years, Mr. Sanford's biggest mistake as a husband might have been urging his wife to become involved in his political career as his free campaign manager. This eventually took the romance out of their marriage, as she became his adviser. Even as his affair became fodder for the press, the governor was calling his wife for advice rather than to take care of her feelings. He involved her in shaping his public image too much for her to be the soulmate he longed for.

What Ms. Sanford did right all along was to take care of herself. Unlike him, she reserved time for introversion, meditation, yoga, journaling and reading, which shines through in the book's varied inspirational and literary quotations from the yogis to the Bible's best. Her selections show wide reading. Between thrilling scenes from frenetic campaigns and her swift ride along the VIP lane to emerge into a political convention's enthusiastic crowds, she often recalls her solitary walks along the beach, comparing her small problems with the ocean's calm expanse. The governor's schedule crowded out such time for his self care.

Ms. Sanford interprets her husband's focus on conservative principles as causing him to lose sight of his personal values. This shows she, at least, tried to understand his needs. People need to feel a healthy mix of both conservation and change, stability and progress. Feeling he had always lived out of duty, the governor, in his intense conservatism, probably bored himself into needing the "exotic" relationship with the Brazilian Maria Belen. Having made his wife part of the conservative political world that consumed too much of his time, Sanford's self-neglected side was drawn to the free spirit who changed from friend to lover through seven years of emails.

Learning of her husband's affair, Ms. Sanford shortly called a lawyer to see how to prepare for divorce. After offering her husband contracted secrecy if he stopped his extramarital relationship, she hoped he would feel lonely when she moved their sons, against their wishes, out of the governor's mansion at the beginning of their summer break. She also asked her husband to leave their beach home.

No wonder, after weeks of his wife's cutting off his communication with her, the governor found growing attraction in his welcoming lover. Ms. Sanford's failed strategies to shock, manipulate and change her husband into reversing his attraction to Belen probably enlarged his preference for heart connection elsewhere. After his early mistakes of involving his wife too much in his public career, Ms. Sanford reacted during their crisis over his affair by moving in the opposite direction, taking steps away from communicating with him.

Still, she felt she did her best, ending the book with ennobling self-affirmation: "I have lived these married years as loyally, as honestly, as lovingly and as committed as I could."

The profound soul searching involved in a long marriage's ending is here given thoughtful articulation.
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As the only book I can think of by a betrayed political wife that addresses the betrayal in detail, this book is interesting in that it sheds some light on the problem in general. As Jenny Sanford presents it, the problem that developed in their marriage is that, with him entering politics almost immediately and remaining a politician for the duration of their marriage, they led almost completely separate lives, despite her being involved in politics as his campaign manager and adviser. Even before he was talked of as a potential presidential contender, the schedulers in his office with his consent had him going almost 24/7 with constituent meetings, fundraisers and other events--how do you successfully push for much unprogrammed "hanging out with the family" time in the face of that? Even to the extent Mrs. Sanford was a part of his political life, it actually seemed to work against their relationship, with him treating her as a professional colleague more than a wife.

The book is fairly balanced in that it doesn't seek to present Governor Sanford as some kind of monster, and Mrs. Sanford is in control of her emotions as of the time of writing and has seemingly genuinely tried to and maybe succeeded in forgiving her husband. But it's also true that it's not a soul-searching enough book that she really takes a hard look at any failings of her own. I guess she leaves that to her husband's future memoir (only so likely?).

I got something out of the book, but as usual with these quasi-celebrity books, you wish the author had been pushed more by collaborators and editors--to be more detailed, to give more examples. Part of the problem presumably is that with few exceptions, people in politics do not tend to be very reflective--they're "people people" and people of action, so maybe there's only so much reflection to be done.

I thought this was a very well-written, fair account of what happened between Jenny and Mark Sanford. Jenny doesn't seem to be out to get revenge as so many people are claiming. In fact, in the first half of the book she spends a great deal of time reflecting on the happy times in her marriage and talking about the GOOD things her husband did. She is telling the story as it happened and how it affected her. Even though she's a Republican, I applaud her for her strength and resilience over the past year. Kudos to you, Jenny!

As a resident of SC, I was expecting not to like the book, wishing this embarrassing story would just end. I was afraid it would be a promotional tool to launch her own political career. Instead it was an insightful book that left me feeling inspired and wanting to read more. I appreciate her explanation of what happened and her efforts to shield her family and the state from this drama. I do wish the book had an index so I could refer back to quoted scripture verses and favorite vignettes.

I always voted for Mark Sanford through the years and simply did not believe it when the media reported his affair. That is, until his awful press conference, during which I kept thinking, where is Mark Sanford's father. Someone make him shut up and act right! Now that I've read Jenny's book, I understand that he lost his father as a young man. I do hope he can find positive male mentors to help him grow up and get his life back on track.

I hope Jenny will follow this book with at least two others, one on raising boys and another on personal finance within a marriage. I found it curious that the beach house was in her name and not both of their names, according to published reports. What married couple, who are not lawyers, does this? She certainly seemed able to protect herself financially throughout the marriage despite her husband's miserly controlling ways and despite the fact that she was a stay-at-home mom. I am intrigued by this and want to know more.

I do hope Jenny Sanford will continue to live in South Carolina, which is notorious for being a good ol' boy state. We need more women like her working for change in SC.

Jenny has done her sons no favor by writing this book..though she states she has done it to help them.

Her sons will forever be scarred by their father's oddities, and emotional distance.

She has helped herself by venting.
She is not poor. That little houme on Sullivan's is worth a couple or 3 million....likely more.

She has helped other smart brave women ( I identify here) , who saw the red flags and pretended they were not there prior to marriage. There's a reason for the song: Young and Foolish. Love really is blind. Then things happen......and sometimes it's easier just to go along.

She ought to donate proceeds to women's shelters and other organizations that help women get their lives back, after experiences such as jenny had. To those who are helping women without the back-up on a few million or so.

She has hurt her sons.And will live with that.

Helped other women who were once young and foolish, thereby taking the wrong path.

I enjoy memoirs, especially political ones. This one was an easy, enjoyable read. I left admiring Jenny Sanford -- she is a strong, smart, intuitive woman who believed in family enough to make sacrifices for it. And she still is. Despite looking back and seeing in hindsight aspects of her husband's character that should have given her pause long before, she doesn't doubt herself. I loved that! Many women coming out of such a situation would be kicking themselves in hindsight. But she did her best with the circumstances handed her and seems at peace with the life she sees before her now.

This is the autobiography of the wife of South Carolina Governor Mark Sanford. Her father and uncle was part owners of the Milwaukee Braves baseball team. Her husband was having an affair and they had separated so he could "get his head right" as he had claimed the affair was over. Unfortunately, he lied, the affair was continuing, and the press found out.

When they were engaged, Mark jokingly asked her to sign an agreement that her personal expenses, including any medical bills, would be capped at $100 per month. While it was a prank, it also showed the male chauvinism in his humor.

Mark became bored at work and decided to go into politics. He ran for Congress. Jenny saw him as an idealistic candidate campaigning against enormous odds of winning. They loaned the campaign $100,000, which included money shoe was inherited. Her sister-in-law made homemade campaign signs. The press considered Mark Sanford as a fringe candidate. He handed out fake billion dollar bills as a protest against Federal spending. He campaigned in favor of term limits and was the only candidate who promised to limit himself to three terms. A poll six weeks before the primary had him running in fifth place with 2% of those surveyed supporting him. He began campaigning on the fact him campaign had spent less money than had been raised. A poll a week before the primary had him in fourth place with the support of 14% of those surveyed.

Mark Sanford learned a lesson in politics and the media. A reporter asked how he would vote if a bill had funds for roads in his district but contained billions of dollars of wasteful projects. He replied he would vote against it. The press then reported he was against roads in his district. Sanford finished second with 19% compared to leader Van Hipp's 31%. In South Carolina, a runoff is held if no candidate receives a majority. Sanford won the runoff with 52% of the vote.

The Democratic Congressional Campaign Committee criticized Sanford for having been a professional goose exterminator in New Zealand. His opposition to increased spending for creating more police officer positions had him labeled as "pro-crime". Sanford still won with 67% of the vote.

Jenny Sanford stayed in South Carolina to raise their three, and later four, boys. She writes about the strain it was living apart. Several members of a Congressional fellowship advised her not to get angry at Mark.

The author also learned that fundraising is a constant part of politics. Her husband was often away at fundraisers.

Mark Sanford was elected Governor. Jenny Sanford had to worry that her sons did not break things in the Governor's Mansion. Her four year old son once became stuck in an elevator, which became a news item. She also learned to accept that the University of South Carolina Gamecocks sports teams made it appropriate for her sons to wear hats that read "COCKS".

Over time, the author noticed her husband became more distracted. He would spend even his spare time away from his family. Jenny discovered the affair. He promised the affair was over just hours before he bought tickets to fly with his mistress to Argentina.

When Governor Sanford flew to Argentina, his staff as well as Jenny did not know where he was. Word that the Governor was missing hit the news. The affair became public.

Jenny Sanford used prayer and her faith to forgive her husband. She also moved out of the Governor's mansion and left him.

I'm not sure I would have bought and read this book if I hadn't seen Jenny Sanford on GMA and been curious about her story. That said, I was very disappointed in the style of writing which I found to be rather blah..it lacked the descriptiveness of good fiction and the hard fast punch that is usually found in newspaper reportage..all, in all, I continued reading because I wanted to endure till the end.
Based on the background she gives of her family of origin, I came away with the impression that she was idealistic and quite naive when she met and married Mark. I can't imagine why she would have ever consented to go to S.C. and arrive at the airport without anyone meeting her and then have to drive all alone to an out of the way destination to meet up with this man and his family!
Southern men just do not treat women that way! I know because I was born and raised and still live in the south. Well, anyway, I digress....I think it's good that Jenny wrote the book in the sense that it probably served as a good catharsis for her and after putting up with and going along with the miserly, self-centered, controlling ways of her spouse for so long, it's good that she finally found her voice. Her idealism led her to become a long-suffering, door mat for too long and after the public humiliation she must have endured, when that fool she married told the world he had "found his soulmate" (the other woman) she finally grew up and smelled the coffee.
I wish she had displayed more anger and made fewer excuses for her husband in the book because the weirdo creep she married deserved it.

It was a very easy book to read but I think it was a waste of my time. Neither Mark nor Jenny Sanford have a very compelling story to tell. He is a selfish control freak who let power corrupt his moral principals. She was a dedicated mother who had to be hit over the head with the proverbial baseball bat before she realized her marriage was an empty shell. It is basically a real life soap opera that is probably more common than people choose to admit. Since the Sanfords were in public life their story came out. The things I found most annoying about the book were: (1) every page or two she had to remind the reader that she has 4 sons, (2) she consistently put up with things any self-respecting smart woman who NEVER do (e.g. finding her own way to a boyfriends home off the beaten track alone, putting up with a selfish husband who returned a give he gave her after he found out how expensive it was, knowing he was going to see his mistress in NY and sending a family friend to chaperone???), and (3) her inserting "favorite" biblical quotations every few pages to give the impression that she was this strong morally superior individual vs. her sinning husband. At the risk of sounding heartless, by the time the book ended I could understand why her rat of a husband found a "soul mate" in someone else. She ends the book by saying how blessed she is. However, wouldn't she have been truly blessed if she had found a loyal, warm and giving husband who was there unconditionally for both her and their children?

Jenny Sanford was terribly wronged and hurt by her husband. But I think she should have thought long and hard about taking revenge by writing this book. She may not care that his career is destroyed, but she has four children, and this book could be very harmful to them psychologically and even financially, if their father can't find work in the future. How would you feel if there were a book published by your mother, for anyone in the world to read, about what a rat your father is? Her boys don't deserve this.

I received my book via Amazon and read it in one evening. It seems to me he checked her out for her grit long before the marriage.
That grit served her well, as he was absent in presence, spirit, and
romantic love...though it was clear he could trust her as a mother and chair of his campaigns. Mark Sanford basically checks out of life whenever the itch occurs. Furthermore, he was inconsiderate of his wife, was detached, micromanaged, whined that he was bored,
whined that his heart was sick, absented himself too much from family, and seemed a pretty disconnected and self-absorbed person.
Essentially, Jenny had been in a lonely marriage for a very long time. He comes to her at the end, as if she is his Mother, and he asks permission to visit his soulmate. What a jerk. It reminded me of the poor Tin Man who needed his heart to function again.
His priority - to miss Father's Day with his four boys while on a romp. He's a tad bit squirrely and quirky, but not in the novel way.
Jenny has done fine on her own and she will continue to do so.
She'll find a man worthy of her, one with no red flags, and one who stays true to Jenny. Mark seems fragmented; maybe he'll get some mental health treatment and stop with the sophomoric behaviors.
He is restless and impulsive. Jenny wants peace. Away from him, she'll get it. I know my house is a lot more peaceful after a similar 32 year marriage! May God Bless Jenny and her fine boys.

Jenny Sanford is an exceptional woman, and she's written an exceptionally compelling--actually restrained--book about her life with a megalomaniac. Mark Sanford is another member, albeit at least the vice president, of a fraternity of selfish, self-absorbed politicians (think Bill Clinton, David Vitter, John Ensign, Rudy Giuliani, just for starters) who have received so much public adulation that they believe they're morally and ethically bulletproof, whatever atrocities they commit. The president of this vile fraternity, John Edwards, recently savaged by his accomplice, Andrew Young, epitomizes this loathsome conceit, one paralleled by the professional golfer, basketballer or football star. Left unsaid in "Staying True" is why this extraordinary woman stood by this adulterous, hypocritical liar for so long.

I'm most surprised by Jenny's decision to marry Mark considering the selfish personality he exhibited prior to marriage. This may offer singles a little insight into settling for a mate with major red flags attached to the wedding vows. She's a remarkable lady with lots of CLASS but she obviously wore rose colored glasses when selecting, I mean settling for, a mate.

I read this book last night and I am left with a feeling of what is the REAL story. I didn't want to read so much about Mark's career. I wanted to read about Jenny.

Mark is one sick twisted freak IMHO. How could any woman marry this guy, much less defend him? I can't imagine living life under such oppression and callous disregard.