Ordered for a friend who doesn't do computers. I know nothing of the book but she does.

Decent book. It was recommended to me by my shrink. A little too much feelings drivel for my taste, but a good reference for organization and perspective when dealing with such life events.

This book was recommended by a professional I'm seeing for grief counseling following my divorce. It has reiterated many of the ideas we've discussed in my counseling sessions and has amazed me that at times it seems the author was "reading my mind". I highly recommend it for anyone whose love relationship has ended. It's easy to read; each chapter is unique but tied to the others, and seems to cover all the emotions.

This book was recommended by a professional I'm seeing for grief counseling following my divorce. It has reiterated many of the ideas we've discussed in my counseling sessions and has amazed me that at times it seems the author was "reading my mind". I highly recommend it for anyone whose love relationship has ended. It's easy to read; each chapter is unique but tied to the others, and seems to cover all the emotions.

It's been about a year since I read this book but it came at a time when I really needed it.

Close to two years ago my husband left. We had been together for 12 years and had just had a baby. I was devastated. I was crushed. I was lost. I ordered this book based on the reviews and started it when it first arrived, however, I didn't get very far. It was too difficult to face that things were really over between us. At the time, I wasn't ready to begin "moving-on."

A few months after my split I met a wonderful guy. I was VERY concerned that I was rebounding or that I wasn't "ready" for a new serious relationship and that's when I pulled out this book and read it from cover to cover. Because of some counseling I had, I had already worked thru a lot of the building blocks discussed in this book but the book really helped me thru the rest of them. It helped me to see some really negative things about my previous relationship that I hadn't been ready to face. It also helped me to become a "whole" person without a romantic relationship.

Overall I really liked this book and thought the ideas expressed were very helpful to someone going thru a divorce. The only caution I can offer to future readers is that the book probably won't help you unless you are truly willing to face the facts and move on. If you are looking for a book that will console and comiserate with you - this is not your book. If you are looking for a book that will truly help you work on yourself and help you *deal* with your divorce then you should find this book extremely helpful. Again, you need to be "ready" before you will gain anything from this book.

When I was going through my divorce, I was devastated. My psychologist, Maria, recommended this book. It was so helpful to me, that every time I have a friend or colleague who goes through an emotionally wrenching breakup, I buy them a copy. This is what everyone needs to know to get back on track and get on with their lives.

It was really good, help me a lot to undestand my feelings and find a method to cope during and after divorce..

Really liked the final part of each chapter for kids cope, I have a 5 year old son recovering together with me...

I bought this originally for my partner's sister who has recently separated from her husband of 30 years. After reading other reviewers comments, I thought to get it and scan through it before giving it to her as a gift.

From scanning just a few pages of various chapters, I really liked it for the simple language and 'matter of fact' style of writing. I believe it is relevant for those who are currently in a relationship who would like to 'get back to the basics'. Sometimes, we are so caught up in our own world, we forget what brought two people into a relationship in the first place.

Good book. You can start from any chapter instead of having to read it from beginning to end. I gave one as a gift and bought another one for myself as well.

I am about 1/3 through this book and am finding it to be succinct, focused, relevant and exceptionally useful. The authors have done an amazing job distilling the essence of the work that one must do to recover from the loss of a love relationship, and why the work is necessary. I have already ordered it for a friend who is struggling mightily with his recent loss.

i found that this book, although dated, is an excellent resource for all individuals coping with divorce (spouses, that is, not as much children). at the used price, this book provides outstanding help for most everyone going through divorce. i found that it was well written and well organized. it might very well be worthwhile the price new, as well. excellent resource for divorcing couples, family members concerned about divorcing couples, and mental health professionals dealing with divorces among clients. divorce, while not something that i personally approve of, provides adults with excellent opportunities for personal growth.

Very informative book. The book and workbook are also used to teach a course, which I believe will be very helpful. The book is very accurate with explaining the feelings that people are going through during a separation/divorce and it gives you positive strategies and tools to use to be able to grow and get through this very difficult time and come out of it a whole person. I also like that it gives you ideas of how to help your chidren during this transition also.

This book has seriously helped me through a v. tough time, and I've turned to it over and over again. It captures all of the nuances of the divorce process, and helps to make sense of it all. I can't recommend this book enough, and I've bought *a lot* of books about divorce. There is another one that I like, something about Daily Meditations, but this is my #1.

I first read this book when it was newly published many years ago. It literally gave me a 'roadmap' of where to go through a confusing web of conflicting emotions. I think that it is most useful doing the first year after a relationship breakup, although I did refer to it many times subsequently. Since then, I have given away numerous copies to troubled and unhappy people. Time, of course, is the best healer, but this book is a great support to anyone on that journey. Bruce Fisher and his wife came to Australia and NZ years ago to give workshops which were very useful to lots of people. If you are prepared to do'the hard work' you will find it a very useful book.

This is a very important subject when divorcing...you must think ahead, plan ahead and move forward. i also recommend I Love You. Now What?: Falling in Love is a Mystery, Keeping It Isn't

This booked helped some in understanding the grief process, but it did not make it any easier.

A friend recommended this book to me. I also found it helpful not only the first read, but to go back to as time went by.

They claim after reading the book or attending their divorce seminars you must feel like you have climbed the mountain of growth. That can't happend so easy. It hurts towards the end of the book when they make you feel like you are expected to have accomplished some major breakthroughs if you did the tests at the end of chapters. I wish it was so easy Mr. Bruce.
The book might be worht reading, but beware of those rip off seminars.

I really thought this book would help me heal. It seemed to solve everyone else's problems, but I guess they all have hearts that work in mechanical order. But with four page chapters on the "stages" I would go through, it did nothing for me. I tried to force myself to have the stages in nice, neat order, the ones I was supposed to have, and it was disasterous. Emotions don't happen in nice, neat order. In one month, one week, one day even I might slide from rage to depression to guilt to loneliness to acceptance. I felt like I was failing! The simplistic descriptions of emotional states and then a checklist of if you're ready to move on is a linear, shaming process. Get a therapist, journal, freak out at close friends, accept wherever you are in your OWN process and don't let a book dictate the "right way" to heal.

I can't tell you how disapointed I am, as I'm still waiting for the delivery! :-(

I first came upon "Rebuilding" in 1985 when my long-term primary relationship ended. I was in pieces mentally, spiritually and physically. I started to read this book and wouldn't go ANYWHERE without its affirming and helpful messages. It accompanied me on my in-patient treatment for alcoholism and ended up on my counselor's most recommended reading list.
After over 22 years of sobriety, and 15 years into a most healthy relationship, I still re-read "Rebuilding" from time to time. I've continued to recommend it to women walking that old walk; it has everything I need to keep my head focused on going forward in my relationship-building life.

I thought that this book had some very good content. It reviews the "19 building blocks" of divorce, going over each of the significant emotions/stages a recently divorced person experiences. As far as my experience goes, the emotions identified were all correct. According to the book, if you work through all the stages you arrive at "freedom." It does include information for parents, but it was separated in the chapters, so a divorcee without children could easily skip those sections.

My problem with the book was the writing style. I felt like the author spoke in a slightly condescending tone and kept reminding the reader how well he knows us and how wonderful and correct his program is. So while I appreciated what the book had to say, I got tired of hearing it tell me how fabulous it is!

This book was helpful after twenty years of lies and manipulations my ex-husband put me and our children through. I felt like such a fool, and thought I had hit rock-bottom. I had to clean up the emotional damages he left behind. This book confirmed for me what I was doing correctly, to heal; and helped with direction to move forward. My ex lives with the woman he had his affair with; a dream come true for someone who wanted his life to be "all about me from now on". My kids and I openly communicate, we've become even closer, and are moving on without his negative energy present.

This book covers alot and is well worth the money-anyone going through a divorce or seperation should read this book. It explained alot and was very comforting. I recommend this book especially if you or your signifcant other have childhood issues that are/were a problem.

An excellent book to help healing after the breakup of a relationship. I first used this book years ago following a divorce and have given it to a number of friends and relatives after they had a relationship breakup. It is a very practical way to return to normalcy.

This is a very useful reference for people trying to rebuild their lives after a divorce or death in their marriage relationship.

I wish I'd found this book earlier in my process of recovering from heartbreak and divorce. Nothing is going to make the pain go away, but this book really helped me understand what I was going through. It assured me that the crazy mix of emotions I was feeling were quite normal and it gave me so much comfort knowing that eventually I would heal and move on. I would not have believed it if didn't describe what I was feeling then so accurately. If you're hurting after the end of a relationship - BUY THIS BOOK IMMEDIATELY and start reading.

Rebuilding your life after a divorce is a daunting process. Divorce is a life altering event and it takes time to heal emotionally. I like how this book helps the reader deal with the emotional aspects of divorce. It helps get you on the road to recovery and ready to begin your new life.

Christina Rowe
Seven Secrets to a Successful Divorce

Unfortunately, I have experienced the end of two previous relationships. As you will learn by reading this publication, it does not matter who ended the relationship; the steps towards rebuilding (your life) are the same. If you continue to struggle after having read this book, read it again. It was necessary for me to read it several times before I could accept all that it has to offer.

This practical book covers the range of human emotions experienced when a love relationship ends. A seminar series in my area run by marriage counselors is build around this book. I HIGHLY recommend it to people with a broken heart looking to put their life back on track. The book is far more secular than others I have read in this area. For the more religious persons, I advise several of the other books available in this area.

This is an excellent source for those of us who have experienced or are experiencing divorce or the loss of a relationship. There are many truths and insights in the book that allow you to think through and process this pain. It is excellent!

As it had many good reviews, I bought this book and workbook for my sister who is going through a divorce. She told me that "Rebuilding" has been quite comforting in some of her most difficult hours. She said it covers what to expect, down to the symptoms of illness she has experienced due to heavy stress and emotional upset. She also says the book enabled her to understand that her grief is temporary, and that eventually she can start afresh. She has recently purchased a copy for a friend who has separated and is planning to divorce. Rebuilding Workbook: When Your Relationship Ends (Rebuilding Books)


Something I know from personal experience; there are many facets to the process of divorce, but with the help of caring individuals, (and they are out there,) instrospection, and a bit of optimism, life can be good again.

I listened to the audio version of this book; it's excellent so I recommend this book in either form: print or audio. It's clear that Bruce Fisher understands the issues we all confront when divorce happens. As a divorced woman, single mom, and now a family counselor, I found this book helpful and right-on-target. I highly recommend it.

Barbara Sheldon, M.S.W.
I also highly recommend: Moving Forward After Divorce: Practical Steps to * Healing Your Hurts * Finding Fresh Perspective * Managing Your New Life

This is homework for anyone going thru a divorce.
It is an easy read and there is a workbook if you so desire
all n all ... cheaper than a shrink and possibly more helpful.

Excellent guide book to thoroughly journal with and self-grow with to recover from an ended relationship AND cheaper than therapy!

Ten years ago I went through a very painful divorce and a friend gave me a copy of this book. Reading it from cover to cover slowly brought me back to sanity. Since that time I've purchased numerous copies for friends that were struggling and it helped all of them.

I got a copy for a friend who was divorcing and another copy for myself so that I could understand the process better and be more helpful to her. This book was recommended to me by another friend who had divorced and I recommend it also.

Ten years ago I went through a very painful divorce and a friend gave me a copy of this book. Reading it from cover to cover slowly brought me back to sanity. Since that time I've purchased numerous copies for friends that were struggling and it helped all of them.

We have used this book and workbook in a divorce recovery group at church no going on the 3rd session. We have found that it is quite helpful and provides a clear description of the issues faced by those in either a separation or divorce situation.
The biggest problem is that it is no longer in print and is often hard to find sufficient quantities for the group--except through Amazon.com.

I read this book after a painful divorce with someone I loved very much. I loved the person, but could not live with his actions any longer. This book helped me become a stronger person and realize that it was important for me to be out of that situation. Several years later I was remarried and we lost our baby to SIDS. I remember going back to this book. It helped me want to continue living and take stepping stones to move back up the mountain. Now I have a new friend who is having trouble letting go of a bad relationship and I am buying this book for her.

Marina Kushner
Author
The Truth About Caffeine: How Companies That Promote It Deceive Us and What We Can Do about It

When a relationship ends, it feels like a car wreck! Everything hurts, your days become longer your nights become lonelier and the inevitable question of why comes up. Why did that person leave? Why wasn't I good enough? Why didn't I see it coming? Why does it hurt so badly? Why can't I stop the pain? An endless stream seems to conquer your will to move on to the next level of a better tomorrow.

Bruce Fisher and Robert E. Alberti have written a book that can help you understand the why's and get you to the how's...How to rebuild your life. How to get through your day and move on to the next. Excellent book, excellent read.

This is a good book, but I found it strange the way that Alberti always talks about Bruce Fisher's ideas in the third person. And in a couple of instances, he even contradicts Fisher's teachings! Better to just get it straight from the horse's mouth, in my opinion! Bruce Fisher is the sole author of the first and second editions. THOSE books get five stars!!!

This book is amazing! It has been really helpful as I am trying to heal from my divorce. I really love the content and advice and all of the great exercises that really help stimulate various thoughts and emotions and are helping me to better understand myself, my relationship, and what I need to do heal myself and be ready for another relationship. As a counselor, I also recommend this book to my clients who are experiencing the loss of a relationship, and I have seen them heal as they go through this book. It's an excellent resource!

After an awful divorce (not my choice) of a relationship of 20 years and marriage of 11 years and a an 8 mos. old baby, this book was a godsend! It really hit on so many things I was feeling. It guided me though each phase that I was going through. I picked it up often to re-read. I would recommend this book to anyone who has just came out of a terrible breakup.

This book was the BEST thing I have read since beginning my divorce process. I feel like I have progressed so rapidly thanks to the information and practical advice found here.

The writers guide the readers on HOW to change "stumbling blocks" into "rebuilding blocks". It's not full of over-your-head psychobabble. Very practical exercises to help you analyze the process of coping with divorce.

One exercise I particularly benefitted from was the "goodbye letter" to your former spouse. It is not intended to be sent to them, but rather as a healing exercise in which to let go of all the facets of your dead relationship...good, bad and ugly.

This book helps you to recognize the mixed emotions that go along with such a life changing event. YOU CAN SURVIVE! In fact you can THRIVE! Learning how to be single again is tough after being married (whether things were good or bad), but it can be the best experience of your life! Read this book and recommend it to all of your divorced friends!

I found Rebuilding at the local Library when I went looking for a different Amazon bestseller, and I am SO glad I picked up Fisher & Alberti's book first. I was lucky enough to get this book just a couple weeks after my wife asked for a divorce, and so I was starting right into the phases of Denial, Anger, and so forth just as I read about them in the book. I read it over the course of 3 weeks, then checked it out again and started over -- and the second time, I took my time and actually focused on the exercises at the end of each chapter. By the time I was done, I was pretty much done with hoping for a reconciliation, and the anger is pretty much all gone.

I do recommend having someone to talk to about the exercises in the book -- a sort of accountability partner, a friend to whom you can REALLY open up. (Guys, take note of that: You need someone who is willing to listen to your pain, not someone to slug back a couple of cold ones while throwing darts at her picture.) It's important to have someone to talk to about the various topics in each chapter -- not just to vent but to discuss the ideas, to focus on your situation and find ways to move on with rebuilding your life.

During my second read, I also took the time to write a long letter of goodbyes, as recommended in the book. (My soon-to-be-ex has never seen that letter, and she doesn't need to.) I was surprised at some of what I wrote, but it really helped to dig up those hidden resentments and now-dashed hopes. By the end of my second read, I was ready to focus on other things besides HER.

Only time will tell how effective Rebuilding will be for me, but in these first 4 months, it has been invaluable. The library finally has their copy back and now I've bought my own. If you're starting into the divorce process, get this book to go along with one about the legal stuff. AVOID a book that tries to cover both the legal and the emotional problems in one volume, as it will invariably give both topics insufficient coverage.

I wish I had found this book a little earlier on in the divorce process. When my wife first left me, things went downhill quickly for me emotionally. I was frozen at work and at home. As a guy that had problems dealing with my emotions to begin with, this book provided some insight into what was going in my head and heart. As other reviewers have said, it let's you know that you are not alone out there, and the things you are experiencing are part of the normal grieving process.

If you are trying to pick yourself up after the ending of a significant relationship in your life (as dumper or dumpee), this book can at least point you in a healthy direction, while you are trying to sort thru just what happened.

Though it is short on advice as to coming to terms with the ending of the relationship and figuring out what went wrong, it's greatest strength is as a companion to your journey toward healing.

Anyone who dumps you clearly has no repect for you or their self. You must always communicate to see what the other person is thinking and feeling. When they don't communicate, they could possibly dump you. Pick up on the cues. The books says about the dumping language, but it is all pretty obvious. The person is being a coward!! If the person really loves you and wants to a least be your friend then the person will talk to you about what is right and wrong. You may have started a relationship with a serial dater/dumper, who is in denial about their problems, emotional issues and fears, and you didn't find out before hand.

Don't control the person because that is exactly what the dumper is doing - controlling what happens in the relationship. Confront the person with their own thoughts and feelings by communicating. Love yourself, because that person clearly doesn't love their self. But, remember, still have some compassion for that person.

Take care.

Going through divorce is difficult, alienating, and painful. I found this book to be a great source of material on the stages of pain that you go through with a divorce. This book takes you through the building blocks of what it will take for you to go through, and ultimately rebuilt from. Some of the topics covered are denial, fear, adaptation, friendship, loneliness, self-worth, transition,love, trust, and future relationships.

I found myself clearly identifying with many of the stages that others go through in a divorce. It was refreshing to hear what you feel is normal and others feel that way too. Fisher and Alberti definately speak with insight, and understanding on this topic. This book was part of the reading along with the a divorce recovery class I took, this book was an important reasource in the class. It is definately worth picking up or checking out at your local library.

I have purchased over 5 of these books already for family or friends going through a divorce or long term relatioship ending, they have all found much comfort from reading it. Most of them carry it with them wherever they go to refer to it while in social settings or whatever life presents them. The only disappoiment I had was with Amazon. I was given the option for a two day delivery and paid the extra charge. The book was ordered on a Thursday and it wasnt recieved for more than a week later!! I am not pleased.

"Rebuilding" was highly recommended to me by a counsellor. I have found it an incredible resource that not only helps in understanding what went wrong in the relationship but provides insight into the various stages all individuals go through following a separation. It addresses issues of relevance to both the "dumper" and the "dumpee" and opens the door to self-discovery and personal growth. Reading the book is like having a long talk with your best friend.