My family is getting ready to adopt a special needs child and they were told to purchase this book along with the Martian Child movie. We purchased both of these items and they are very good to help in the thought processes behind a special needs child. The book shows a completely different way in bringing up children versus the old fashioned way. We have not finished the book yet but we are darn sure it is going to help.

One of the co-authors of this book (Foster Cline, M.D.) is the psychiatrist whose "attachment therapy" resulted in deaths and torture of children. (See "Advocates for Children in Therapy" at http://www.childrenintherapy.org/.) My child -- now 20 and an honors student adored by family and friends -- had oppositional and destructive behavior with tantrums. My husband and I followed advice similar to that in this book, culminating when our son became suicidal at age 8. At that point my husband and I looked at each other with the simultaneous unspoken thought: "We can't keep treating him this way." We instead relied on our own sense of how far to go. Later, when I read, "The Explosive Child" by Ross Green, I said to myself, "This man has written a book describing how we decided to raise our son!" It was such a relief to read, "The Explosive Child." Our change in approach paid off -- and the medications finally were tweaked correctly, and guess what: his behavior changed overnight from awful to excellent. It wasn't that he didn't WANT to behave like others: it was that he COULDN'T. As soon as the medications allowed him to control his behavior and distorted perceptions, all the good parenting and modeling we had done kicked in immediately. "Love and Logic" is based on the belief that natural consequences are all that's needed -- but if your child has a brain disorder that causes a distorted view of what's happening, the consequences you would have to resort to would be torture.
It's MUCH MUCH better to understand the disorder and how it is distorting your child's thoughts and perceptions, and get it treated by a board-certified child psychiatrist. Also, read, "The Explosive Child." (By the way, our son has not taken any medications in three years. The medications bought him time to mature enough to be able to make use of cognitive-behavioral techniques to control his anxiety. I also think the medications may have allowed his brain to develop normally so that eventually he didn't need them.)

There are a ton of "parenting" books available but this one is helping me a great deal. Good illustrations and easy to read; the logic makes sense and the love is there.

This a an outstanding book for parents to learn those parenting skills necessary to raise happy and healthy children. Another must-read for parents is Bully-Proofing Children: A Practical, Hands-On Guide to Stop Bullyingwhich is about raising empowering children who will never become victims or bullies.

This is a no nonsense approach to keeping your cool while
helping your kids listen and learn about life. Even though
it might not work with all kids this book is a must read
for any parent the earlier you read it the better.

My son just turned 2 and is at a very independant age. I wanted to write this review because of one that I read about this book. One thing is that no one can go by 1 book and take it as gospel (obviously) but there are a lot of great things that make you stop and reflect with this book. I can honestly say that I can now get my son to wear a jacket and let me change his diaper because I give him choices that still get me what I want. "do you want to wear your blue jacket or your red jacket" he is so consumed with what color he wants to wear that he forgets that he didn't want to wear a jacket in the first place at 55*. As simple as it seems, it works over 90% of the time with my son. I even got my husband on board because he saw the results.
As for the "spanking" most of this book I did agree with. I will not swat my son on the butt for throwing his food on the floor, but I will if he runs into the street! Not one time in this book does it suggest spanking as a solution to anything.
It is an easy read and worth every minute.

This book was helpful and informative for us. We always need extra help and good ideas, this book offers both. We have seen a change in our child too, as we offer more choices and love to him.

I would highly recomend this book to anyone that wants help parenting there kids the christian way.

My sister's partner just has the lovliest kids (5, 13 & 15). My own had a habit of being rude to me, ignoring my requests for cooperation around the house and being very ungrateful for all the things they have. I begged her to tell me her secret & she recommended this book. I got it from the library & decided to purchase my own copy within a week. Our home life has changed drastically! I hardly ever yell now. My eldest, 9 yrs old, says he doesn't like the Love & Logic approach - he'd rather I just yell.....

Helpful tips: Really, this only works if you (the parent) doesn't nag & lecture or go into 'I-told-you-do-so' moralizing, etc.
GOOD LUCK!

While enjoyed this book, I wish I would have bought the one geared more towards the individual ages of my kids. There was a lot of irrelevant information that was given, but over all the system worked wonders on my kids. I would recommend getting one of the others written by the same author, but geared towards the age of kids you have.

I am not a licensed child therapist, but I am a journalist (and parent) who has done quite a bit of research into this topic. While this book may seem broadly appealing, especially for parents who are at wits' end and are looking for a quick solution to behavioral and disciplinary problems, I would urge readers great caution and more than a grain of salt if they intend to apply the methodologies listed within.

Readers should understand that while this book appears to offer a balanced approach based on teaching a child to understand the consequences of his decisions, it advocates some approaches -- for example, spanking -- that have been proven by the scientific community to be ineffective. As other one- and two-star reviewers have noted, other "consequences" are borderline abusive (withholding food, for instance).

It bears noting that the primary author, Foster Cline, is a pioneer of a very controversial therapeutic approach called Attachment Therapy, in which children are physically restrained and physically and verbally tormented (some would say tortured) in an attempt to get them to acknowledge the dominant role of the parent and to "give up" rage and related behaviors. Dr. Cline in 1995 was charged with various breaches of professional conduct by the Colorado State Board of Medical Examiners.

Attachment Therapy is viewed with at best skepticism and at worst horror by the mainstream psychiatric community. The approach has been implicated in the deaths of four children (ranging in age from 10 to 2) in which AT therapists and/or parents have suffocated or crushed children and in one case caused death by overhydration, when a four-year-old was force-fed water after she drank her sister's juice.

Please be very careful if you choose to purchase this book and put the principles into action. Do not feel you have to follow the guidelines as gospel and if anything seems wrong to you as a parent, heed your conscience. Better yet, eschew this book and look for those based on sounder psychological principles (the books by Adele Faber are excellent).

Love the concepts and book ~ a real must read !
Some suggestions seem to be far fetched but the book gave me tons of valuable inputs and I guess everybody should implement only the strategies they strongly believe in anyhow.

I borrowed this book from the library and have just finished reading part one. I will admit first that I am the product of what the authors call "helicopters," so some of the ideas in the book are unusual to me.

In general, I like the idea of natural consequences, enforcable choices, and encouraging children to think through their problems. I can see myself using these principles with my own daughter, but not always the way the authors do it. Some of the sample dialogues in the book are reasonable but many do not sound as genuine and empathetic as the authors imply.

Some of the examples in the book and in the "pearls" are making me very upset. In one case, a child has been neglecting her dog by not feeding it, so the mom just gives it away with no warning and without confronting the girl about it. The authors admit this is a really tough approach but that's how kids learn that unless you take care of your health and your animals serious illness or death can result. Now this sounds crazy to me. In our home, we think of pets as a family responsibility, so that might be one difference. Still, wouldn't it teach the girl more about empathy to sit her down and say "you can either come up with a schedule and feed the dog or we are giving it away, you have one week to improve." Why do these authors feel that giving someone a second chance is a bad thing? It seems this might teach her "if I don't fulfill my responsiblity, someone else will take care of it for me."

Another example is a mom who asked her son to do something and he mouths off and refuses. So the next day when he asks for a ride she says, yesterday you showed me that asking nicely can be ignored, so I'm not going to drive you to your activity, even though you asked nicely. Isn't that just being petty and/or spiteful? That's a great lesson for your kid.

A third example is a kid who blows his lunch money and allowance on a carnival and has no money for lunch at school. So he asks his dad if he can make a lunch from food in the fridge. The dad says, yes, but you have to pay for it because I already gave you money for lunch once. Really? Your kid offers to take responsibility to make his own lunch all week and you are going to charge him for it? I'd think remembering to make lunch everyday would teach him the lesson. I agree to not giving him more money, but charging for the food in the fridge sounds stingy - won't he learn that as part of the lesson too?

I think it is possible for kids to learn self-reliance with this method but some of the examples just sound like the kids would end up feeling like their parents are not willing to help them out without significant groveling. It sounds as though a Love and Logic parent is not supposed to give advice or help a kid work on the solution, or not until the child has time to ponder it and slink back to ask for help. I'm not advocating parents do the solving, just help, like talking it out with them or brainstorming. I thought helping others is an important value to teach our kids (not being doormats, being a sounding board to say "what do you think would happen if you used that solution?"). This seems to teach "I'm genuinely sorry you have a problem but it's still yours." Nice.

I just wonder if some of these examples I've listed would make the kid feel like their parents view them as impositions or that the parents really begrudge them something. I realize that how you do it depends on the age of the child, but some of this still seems pretty harsh the way the authors do it. In some cases I don't think that helping them is equal to bailing them out. The examples sound like the parent says "I know you will come up with a solution" and then they just walk away.

I greatly prefer How to Talk so Kids Will Listen and How to Listen so Kids Will Talk. It also emphasizes consequences and letting kids make choices and solve problems themselves but it shows you how to do this and keep talking with them at the same time. If Love and Logic is a turn-off for you, consider reading this other book before throwing out the consiquences/choices method entirely.

I have just finished reading the book, "Parenting with Love and Logic," by Foster Cline and Jim Fay. Because I am interested in going into the field of Marriage and Family Counseling, I found this book to give me new insight and understanding in working with couples dealing with parenting issues.

So many people struggle with effective parenting, and I like the approach this book gives. The author's goal is to help parents raise responsible kids that feel good about themselves. They begin by discussing ineffective parenting styles, and so many of us may see ourselves within those styles. They continue by giving a new model of parenting in which children are responsible for their actions and have logical consequences to each action. Children must know and understand these consequences, and be free to choose their own actins and accept responsibility for what they choose.

Kline and Fay talk about the concept of self-esteem and building a child's self-esteem. They bring up a great point between the difference between praise and encouragement and how to use the mistakes children make as opportunities.

I appreciated the chapter on setting limits and thinking through words as parents. The authors challenged me to say what I think and mean what I say, instead of making empty threads. They advocate gaining control through logical consequences and giving choices.

Finally, this book ends with what they term, "Love and Logic Pearls," where they discuss various situations and what the practical view of love and logic is in each situation. For example, dealing with anger issues, money, fighting, bedtime, tears, toilet training, temper tantrums, etc. (Cline & Fay, 2006).I found these to be extremely valuable resources and I have used them in my own parenting. I plan to use the concepts in this book as I counsel others. Because I have found these things to be effective myself, I can stand behind these wholeheartedly and explain them to my clients with confidence.

Online Counseling and Telephone Counseling could be a useful way to help struggling couples. To learn how to provide Online Counseling and Telephone Counseling, try this excellent clinical guide: The Therapist's Clinical Guide to Online Counseling and Telephone Counseling: The Definitive Training Guide for Clinical Practice

(review by Ginger Ernst)

Wow! This book has already changed the relationship between my headstrong daughter and I! Incredibly life changing - for both of us and she now feels like she has a little control in making decisions for her life! HIGHLY RECOMMENDED!!!

I love what this book brings to the table. It adds wonderful tools to my parenting tool box.

A have learned so mucho from this book. It is easy to follow and interesting.

My 23 year old daughter (raised on Love and Logic) recently told me that she has been asked by several adults about my secrets for child-rearing. They apparently like the kind of people my 4 kids are becoming and want to know what I've done. I first told her to tell them the jury is still out on whether the 4 have turned out well (the youngest is 12) and then they should be told to read Parenting With Love and Logic. I haven't actually read the book in years (so I am not able to comment on the 2006 edition) but in the early '90s, it was my ready reference. Jim Fay made a powerful point about teaching kids to listen to the voice in their head because when they are teenagers, they sure don't want to listen to parents so if the voice in their head isn't loud enough, they will listen to others. Now that 3 of my kids have navigated at least some of the teen years, I am constantly amazed at the good choices they make. It all started with "Do you want the blue sippy cup or the green one?". I started out with audio tapes (The Life Saver Kit) in 1987 and 20 years later I'm still enforcing natural consequences. This week my 12 year old had to call a cab and pay the $12 fare with Christmas gift money because she'd missed the school bus one too many times. It's hard to be the mean mom but as Cline/Fay write, the cost of a lesson gets more expensive, the older kids get. And the joy of launching a happy, considerate, self-sufficient adult child into the real world is worth it!

My 23 year old daughter (raised on Love and Logic) recently told me that she has been asked by several adults about my secrets for child-rearing. They apparently like the kind of people my 4 kids are becoming and want to know what I've done. I first told her to tell them the jury is still out on whether the 4 have turned out well (the youngest is 12) and then they should be told to read Parenting With Love and Logic. I haven't actually read the book in years (so I am not able to comment on the 2006 edition) but in the early '90s, it was my ready reference. Jim Fay made a powerful point about teaching kids to listen to the voice in their head because when they are teenagers, they sure don't want to listen to parents so if the voice in their head isn't loud enough, they will listen to others. Now that 3 of my kids have navigated at least some of the teen years, I am constantly amazed at the good choices they make. It all started with "Do you want the blue sippy cup or the green one?". I started out with audio tapes (The Life Saver Kit) in 1987 and 20 years later I'm still enforcing natural consequences. This week my 12 year old had to call a cab and pay the $12 fare with Christmas gift money because she'd missed the school bus one too many times. It's hard to be the mean mom but as Cline/Fay write, the cost of a lesson gets more expensive, the older kids get. And the joy of launching a happy, considerate, self-sufficient adult child into the real world is worth it!

This was a baby gift for my daughter in law. She loved it & it's great for first time parents.

The product was received in a timely manor and it was in good condition but I never received confirmation of it being sent or when i would expect it to arrive. Could have been better about communication but the product was great. Thanks

This is a great book. Someone taught this as a class at our church, but having the book is great. It obviously goes into more detail that you can cover in a 45 minute class over a few weeks. Our daughters are 3 and 1 and it's working great. Be sure to read the section on "basic German Shepherd". We thought Love and Logic meant never spanking, but that section gives a few times when you should. Other than those rare occasions, however, we don't have to spank, yell, or threaten, the way most of us were raised.

GET THIS BOOK!!!

p.s. If you plan on using this method of discipline, buy a copy of "Grandparenting With Love and Logic" too and give it to the grandparents, or everything will probably be out the window every time you visit them.

This is a must for parents who need help in managing children and their behavior. It illustrates how giving children a choice and allowing them to make a decision is the most effective way in dealing with them and teaching responsibility. I also recommend Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Childif you child is cranky. For older children, I recommend Win-Win Partnerships: Be on the Leading Edge with Synergistic Coachin I have used the process discussed in this book with my kids, wife, and employees. It offers a process on how to coach for change in behavior and ensure accountability. It is also research based. While it is a book geared towards business, it applies to families very well. Three must have books.

Very helpful. If you are a parent, then you should read this book. It has great alternatives to spanking and helps children take responsibility for themselves. We have yet to come near to mastering the tecniques in this book, but they are worth knowing. I wish I would have read this sooner.

The book is useless garbage. It advocates treating your child like an idiot, and children are not stupid, they know when they are being treated like they are stupid and they resent it. While it may seem logical to have children suffer the repercussions of bad choices, in the real world you cannot follow their examples unless you want Child Services at your door to take your children away.

It fits children into a cookie cutter mold, treating all children like they are the same and from what I've seen at the "Love and Logic" seminar, the adults that follow this are robotic too, adhering to their little "Love and Logic" mantra.

If anything they take love out of the whole thing and allow children to feel unloved and unsupported. If you follow the teachings of this series, don't be surprised if you wind up with sarcastic, cold, aloof children. That is, if they haven't been taken away from you by CPS for doing what it tells you in this book series.

There are several books out there that give advice on parenting with both love and logic, but this series does anything but that.

Logical consiquences and occasional spanking (done the right way) are perfectly fine but not to this extent! This takes it way too far! This book is ridiculous! Being sarcastic & showing no compassion for our kids will NOT help them!

I have a 5, 7, 9, and 11 year old. All VERY different personalities who need different parenting, which I'm looking for help with. While I totally agree with the primary concept of consequences for your actions, I also agree with alot of what "A Customer" says. I didn't like the tone of the book. I couldn't finish it. I have reviewed and purchased "Pick Up Your Socks..." and "Setting Limits..." I'm hoping it's not quite as "sicky sweet" as this book. (I also liked the idea, in this book, of giving the children choices - do what you're told or go to your room - you decide - I use the choices concept.)

I started reading this thinking yes that's true, and yes that makes total common sense. I want my child to grow to be a happy responsible individual capable of making good decisions throughout his life. With this book's suggestions, I can totally see the correlation. I loved the idea of making them own their own problem and knowing when it becomes my problem as well.

I bought these for my six year old daughter, she loves them. They're good quality, especially for the money. She really likes them because they're comfortable (and cute).

A wonderful book for parents. I really liked the part about "thinking words" vs. "fighting words" the best. As the author of the Sleepytown Beagle book series for children, I found this book a must have! ~Timothy Glass

Wow! These techniques actually work! They work well, efficeintly and the first time! Fun IS back in parenting, our girls are happier, more involved and thinking. We're actually getting the girls to sleep, the first time!

I couldn't even finish this book. I found it patronizing and DRY. I couldn't get past how he constantly used himself as the example of what to do "right" and how his son is the reflection of his perfect parenting. Perhaps that wasn't the intent, but that was my perception.

In a counseling office with parents, discipline is an issue that comes up...often. This book is the book on discipline that I recommend the most as a counselor who works with girls of all ages and their parents. A helpful and practical guide!Raising Girls

This book was recommended to me by a newly married woman with stepchildren. I, at the time, was dating a woman with children (none of my own). I was having a difficult time being an 'instant father', and didn't know what to do half the time. I loved this book, and used the information daily. When I am around children now, I still use the information in the book. When I have children of my own, you better believe I'll be re-reading this one. (I also bought this book for my brother)

There are not enough good things to say about this book. I have it in conjunction with Love and Logic Magic for Early Childhood and contrary to some other reviewers, I love having them both together.

I can't recommend this parenting technique enough. I have a 2 year old boy and we started using love and logic principles just after his 2nd birthday. What a difference it made in us all!!! Just like the authors say - it puts the fun back in being a parent. We are always getting comments on his calm demeanor and our ability to always be patient.

If you or someone you know is struggling with a child, toddler to preteen, this book will change the family for the better. It gives you the exact things to say in all kinds of situations, in fact half to book is dedicated to doing just that. This book gives you the tools to restore peace, happiness, hope, order and fun back into your home. I'm so thankful for this book!

All my friend and I SWEAR by this book. This my not be the ONLY book you need, but it surely is one key book you MUST have. Extremely practical - there are actual cases and actual phrases to use, while explaining the philosophy behind the approach. This is the ultimate "how to" book on raising responsible, moral, kind children who understand cause and effect! It also takes the "you vs me" out of it and teaches children that their choices and actions have consequences. As a Christian, it sits well with me. It is especially excellent with defiant or contrary children, and children raise in foster homes or others who have attachment challenges.

This is an excellent book on parenting, the best my wife and I have found. The principles work very well - we wish we had found it earlier. We and our children are much happier after using this book.

This is very sound parenting. This book teaches you how to raise responsible children who think about the consequences of their actions. It teaches principles and gives you strategies to help your children anticipate the real consequences of their actions - a good thing to learn when you're still a child and "the price tag is still low."

This book is not the draconian book that some negative reviewers have interpretted it to be. The authors advocate genuine compassion for children who experience realistic consequences to their bad choices. It is true that the principles in this book likely require more work on the part of the parent than other approaches.

Regarding whether this book advocates corporal punishment - it does not. Page 221 from the 2006 edition:

"Spankings ... give kids a quick escape from the responsibility of living with a bad choice. Instead of having to live with consequences and think about solutions, youngsters have a brief moment of pain, and then they're off the hook."

"The original edition of this book advocateded the use of spanking in limited, controlled situations. However, as we have grown in our professions and as more valid research has become available, we have changed our postion. There are many good reasons to avoid the use of spankings...[list follows]."

Any author who presents themselves as wanting to help children and then advocates corporal punishment is a sociopath at worst or terribly misguided at best. They should never yield power over someone smaller or weaker than themselves. Maybe the authors need to be physically bullied (ex. spanked) by someone 100+ lbs bigger than them so they can feel what a child feels when some stupid or gullible adult follows their advice. Do unto others as you would have them do unto you. Parents and caregivers- please think long and hard before you hit the children who are depending on you for love and protection. There are much better ways of discipling children. Learn them.

Cline and Fay offer some of the most egregious parenting advice I have ever seen. Their take on child-rearing is nothing short of passive aggressive.

In their chapter on "Fears and Monsters" they provide the following scenario:
CHILD: "I don't want to go to bed, Mom. I'm afraid I might die tonight."
MOM: "Thankfully, only one child in ten million will die in his sleep tonight, honey."

On "Allowances/Money" which the authors recommend starting at 5 or 6 they write:
"Jim's son, Charlie, learned a powerful lesson in money management the very first week he got on the allowance payroll. Their family visited a carnival, and the midway barkers had their way with the boy. He came home flat broke.

"Dad, what am I going to do for lunch?" Charlie said when reality struck him on Monday morning.
"Go over to your pay envelope and get your lunch money out," Jim replied.
"But it's all gone," Charlie said.
"Oh, no, that's too bad. What are you going to do?" he said.
"I don't know," Charlie said. "Can I get some food out of the refrigerator and make a lunch?"
"Sure, if you can afford to pay for it," Jim said. "Mom and I have already paid for lunches once, and we don't want to pay for them again."
p. 121


On "Pacifiers":
"In our lives, we have seen many ideas come and go: constant cigarette smoking in public places, collecting pet rocks, and the fad of birthing children into a pan of warm water. What do all these things have in common? Through the course of history, many normal human beings didn't engage in these behaviors. One might say that the behaviors simply aren't "normal" responses of the human race. Use of a pacifier in toddlerhood falls into this category." p. 203

And on preofessional help they say:
"If you have read this book--taking in the Love Logic philosophy and applying it consistently to your children--and still have big problems, then you need professional. p. 213.

Frankly, I'm willing to donate the $24.99 (plus shipping!) refund towards recovery groups for all the children who will be damaged by this book.

The Love and Logic Principles were a life saver in the first year after adopting our daughter at age four. Now if I could just remember to apply them in every situation, it would be smoothe sailing all the time :~). Seriously, the ideas just make sense and they really help parents to stay calm when faced with frustrating behavior. Like in any parenting book, there wil be examples that won't work for everyone, so you take from it what works for your family.

This book has really cut down the battles that used to occur so frequently. So many power struggles can be avoided by offering the child two choices that are acceptable to us, rather than telling them what they have to do.

I am sure this book is useful fo all parents, but for those raising children adopted at older ages...it should be required reading!

Christine Mitchell, author and illustrator of Welcome Home, Forever Child Welcome Home, Forever Child: A Celebration of Children Adopted as Toddlers, Preschoolers, and Beyond

I have used this method in clinical and educational settings as well as in my own parenting. It works! The child(and parent/teacher) soon learns to problem solve instead of looking for others to solve his/her problem. The information is easily understood and put into practice. I have seen the long term result in my child as an adult. It does require teachers/parents to view children as having the capacity to learn how to problem solve using the resources available to them, and, to resist doing it for them.

This book is very helpful. I try and use the suggestions and I notice a difference in my parenting and in my children. The hard part is being consistant! I would recomend this book to every parent.

Well, a lot of us do. Kids don't come with a handbook after all. This book has some good insights and some nice ideas, but you have to be a talented reader to glean them out of the author's poor organization. I am glad I have read it, and do use some of the strategies, but it was a poorly written book. Clearly, it would be better to have a conversation with this writer than just read the book, but it would be a really good conversation. Or perhaps a session in his office with your kids. That is where the talent lies. So, try it out if your kids don't take responsibility for their issues. Take notes and jot down ideas. It can help. Good Luck.

This book was wonderful years ago and has since been updated and just as great if not even better!! This is a great book to refer to when a reoccuring problem is going on....Needs to be on everyone's shelf!!

I read this book first, and thought it was great, but after I read the toddler years version, it changed our lives. I now have both in my home library and refer to them often when I need a refresher course in keeping my cool. I am certain I will refer to this book as my three year old and two month old grow and grow!

Love and Logic Parenting just makes sense. The Love and Logic parents that I know have the most responsible, well behaved, and self confident children I have met. From a young age children learn about cause and effect, naturally. If they let go of their cup, it falls to the floor and makes a mess. Love and Logic teaches parents to apply those same cause and effect principles to teach their children responsibility. Now that I have children of my own I want my children to learn how to make good choices, and feel great about it!

What I learned: I can teach my children by example. When I make good choices, I can feel good about myself, and when I make mistakes, I can learn from them. Teaching children how to make choices, and to take ownership of those choices builds self esteem. Set FIRM limits with SAFE, ENFORCEABLE statements. When I give my children an opportunity to make a choice than a command, there are fewer fights. Show EMPATHY for the child, but let them own their choice AND it's consequences. The more Natural, Logical, and CONSISTENT the consequence (GOOD or BAD), the more quickly my children will learn to make good choices.

The book: The first half of the book discusses the Love and Logic philosophy, in detail with easy to understand techniques. (However, sometimes not easy to implement, especially when we have been doing things differently for a LONG time!) The second half discusses specific situations and how you can apply the Love and Logic techniques in those instances.

Personal Application: As with ANY parenting book, there are things that I do a little differently. But that's MY choice. It is up to ME to determine what SAFE choices I allow my children to make, and up to ME to determine HOW to enforce their consequences.

Helping my children develop a positive self esteem, learn to make good choices and be constructive members of society are very important to me. Love and Logic has given me techniques I can use so that I feel GREAT about my efforts!

I have not yet finished this book, but am so impressed with everything I have read. And so has my husband, who tends to be a little more sceptical. This book just makes so much sence as to how to let the children make their own decisions, with our guidance, with possible mistakes and consiquences attached. They will learn so much from their mistakes and gain the confidence from the idea of making their own decisions. I would highly recommend this for all parents and I actually have referred many of my friends to this book for help! This book takes so much 'work' and 'stress' out of parenting!

One of the best parenting books I've ever read. I have a friend who has NO control over her children at all. She has three children - a boy,5 - a girl,4 and a brand new baby - about five months old now. She's a really close friend and often calls tired and frustrated from dealing with her kids - but still telling even a close friend you don't think they're a good parent is soooo not the way to go.

So, I called my mother and said, "Okay, she has GOT to learn some effective parenting skills or she's dead." I asked for advice on how to help her. My mom reccommended this book. I started browsing it to see if I thought it would helpful. I decided it would and bought it. When I got home I kind of started reading it.

And, I ended up calling my girlfriend and saying, "I am reading the BEST parenting book. My kids are pretty good, but when they push on that line really hard, sometimes I don't know what to do. These techniques are so simple and have honestly been so helpful! I am going to have to get you a copy of this book."

So, I bought a copy to give her - what? you thought I was going to let go of mine???

The principles of Love and Logic seem very sound. The book focuses on natural consequences and how one of the most important thing we can teach our children is how to think, particularly about the consequences of their actions. Unfortunately, some of the practical advice for handling specific situations (E.g. room clean up) are hard to make work in practice. I've found I mix the advice in this book with the advice from 1-2-3 Magic, which is excellent for stopping "negative behavior".

In my opinion, the advice in this book doesn't really apply to kids under about 5.

Finally, something simple and practical... that works! Most of it is common sense, but it's great to have the tools and knowledge to back it up!