I feel for these women and their terrible loss and triumph. Somehow the book didn't capture either of these concepts. Brava to them for attempting this.

Only another woman who had lost her husband to the terrorists on 9/11 could understand what a "9/11 widow" is going through. Should I part with his clothing? What to do about our finances? How do I get through each day without the love and comfort of the man with whom I *thought* I would grow old?

That is the beginning of Love You, Mean It. Four women meet for drinks and form a bond based on their mutual loss. This bond becomes an unconditional love and friendship that forms the basis for their healing (which will never be truly complete, but is helped a thousand-fold by the understanding of others in the same situation). After dealing with well-meaning but ham-fisted strangers ("well, at least you're young and can get married again") and a fire hazard worth of forms (how do you quantify the murder of your soulmate for the bureaucrats?), the companionship and understanding of the "WC" is refreshing and welcome.

The narrative was a bit difficult to get used to at first, as I slowly learned which of The Boys went with which of the authors of this heartbreaking, yet life-affirming, volume. Each widow shares the story of how she met her husband, their life together, how she found out that he had been murdered, and what her life has been like since that awful day. The stories are extremely individual, yet intertwined, and they made me want to greet my husband with a bone-crushing hug every time I see him, and treasure every single moment with him, even the mundane or vexing ones. As one of the women says, "I would give anything to walk into the bathroom and see the seat up again."

These are affluent, professional women, and finances are not an issue for them as was the case with so many of the blue-collar bereft of 9/11. I'm sure there are many widows who would love to simply walk away from their jobs in order to "spend more time with their children." The story here is the emotional damage caused to them out of the clear blue sky that September day, and what an unforgettable story it is.

Having worked at 7 World Trade and evacuated on 9/11, I was reluctant to read this book when it first came out. However, having now finished the book, I can honestly say that it is an important story that imparts a lesson that is very powerful. The book does not dwell on the tragedy that befell these women, though obviously their losses are part of the story. Rather, it describes the strength that each found in the bond that all four shared, and how that bond helped them to recover. What I felt was an important take away was how the tragedy made life ultimately more precious to the "WC" members. Each was driven to value every day and make the most of it. That may sound trite, but the way the book is written makes it real. Having finished "Love You, Mean It", I am motivated to live a better life.

Absolutely love this book! I judge high school speech and debate and a student i was judging did a cutting of one of the stories in this book! I had to have the book!
Strong and Powerful story of friendship, loss, love, and survival!!!
Wonderfully written

Thank you ladies for sharing your innermost thoughts and feelings and ride through what must have been a difficult journey. I admire you and your strength.

My book club just got done reading this book and I found it to be one of the worst books we have chosen. I found it incredibly repetitive. The story of loss and moving forward would have been a great one if there had been more depth and detail about their lives. Instead every chapter included an episode about their latest WC meeting at a bar or some vacation spot, how they keep sliding back into the pit of despair (with the same language used over and over, I swear they cut and pasted half the book) and how ALL of "the boys" were wonderful, outgoing, personable, etc, etc, etc. I lost track of who was married to who since the husbands all seemed so interchangable in their superiority to the average person.
As to it being a story of friendship, it seems they lost a few friends in their determination to be widows, regardless of what other people thought.
I'm glad that they were able to bolster each other through such a tough period in their lives, but enough already!