I've thought about this book for days since I finished it. It's not happy or pleasant. It's disturbing, sort of like watching a car accident about to happen; you can't turn your head and look away.

Sonnenberg's mother was divorced, rich New York socialite who was obviously manic. She lied pathologically, was addicted to Demerol, snorted mountains of cocaine, and was obsessed with sex. She introduced Susanna to cocaine at 12, and gave her a warped understanding of sex.

The book has lots and lots of sex in it, for which some Amazon reviewers have criticized it. But there's nothing erotic about it, and I don't think she intended it to be sensationalist. Because her mother was such a liar, Susanna becomes brutally honest; honest to a fault, and she's just explaining what happened. For a time she could only relate to other people through sex, and her self worth was defined by sex.

Susanna, who in psychobabble terms was codependent, eventually starts to understand what a horror her mother is and how it has affected her. She works hard to get past those demons. She doesn't do the victim thing, and there's no epiphany or grand redemption, just a slow understanding of what's important in life as she gets older.

I listened to the audio CD of this book. It is read by the author. She writes beautifully, but having her read it really adds to it. And there's certainly never a dull moment.

As a memoir of a tragic youth, I thought this vastly better than Wall's The Glass Castle, which I did not find credible.

I like contemporary autobiographies and memoirs very much. I read about this book here and clicked the buy it now button.

I was pulled in immediately. It's the well told story of a girl who grows up in Manhattan in the late '60s and '70s to a young, druggy, ridiculously over-sexed, single mother who tries to turn her daughter, the writer, into her idea of the perfect friend/confidente and abuses her power and authority at almost every turn to do so.

The book is fluent and easy to read. The writer merely reports her experience. She doesn't judge. She doesn't try to explain. She just 'tells it like it is'. So simply is this story told that it's easy to oversee its depth. When I re-read it, I understood things differently. I've since picked the book up again and again and each time re-understood what initially wasn't always so clear. I call that value for money... a book that is a different experience on each re-read. It's THAT good.

The mother, the 'star' of this show, enters each scene with multi-voltage electricity. What a character! When Susanna ejects her from her life, the book sometimes becomes dull. Initially this irritated me, but I now realise, that in fact that's very much what the book is about. Susanna is not the witty, way-out, eccentric, her mother is and wants her to be. She's a rather ordinary girl who grew up in a family where hip and extraordinary was valued above all else. In fact, one feels that there's nothing more that her mother would have wanted than have her daughter write a New York Times Bestseller. One of the many ironies of this tale.

In the end Susanna finds an ordinary, down to earth man and settles in an ordinary middle-American town and brings up her family in the ordinary way because, ultimately she's just an ordinary girl.

The only thing that is not ordinary about Susanna is her extraordinary talent of reportage and how she was able to bravely stand back and relate her own experience of growing up in a world where she ultimately did not belong.

Forgive me if, so far, my review has been somewhat trite. It's just that the entertainment value is what remains with me most or maybe that's the part I want to remember. The abuse she suffers is so horrific that it's hard to entertain. But from this horror often humor emerges from the sometimes deadpan style it is written in. The fact that the story takes place in the 'privileged' Upper Eastside of Manhattan and in various 'jet-set' locations adds to its power. It's moronic to suggest that just because there is money, there is no excuse for pain. Even the money, like everything else in this woman's story, is, inconsistent.

Some people have written here that they find the author, at times, unlikeable. Personally, I don't think it matters. She doesn't want you to like her. She doesn't try to manipulate you into liking her or feeling pity for her. That's part of why the book works so well. It's up to the reader to make these decisions. No one in this book is all bad and no one all good. These are real people. There's no laugh track to tell you when to laugh. No musical soundtrack to tell you how to feel. It's an adult book, told by someone who found it hard to grow up and now she has, she makes no excuses for how she is or how she has been. I, for one, am very glad she had the guts to put it all down because what she's created is a tremendous and masterful memoir and one of the best things I've read in a very long time.

Her Last Death is one of the best memoirs I've read in recent memory. It's not necessarily the most outrageous or exotic, but it manages to tread the line between description and emotion without veering too far into either one. Despite the fact that the book is about the relationship between (volatile) mother and daughter -- a relationship that is rife with complications under the best of circumstances -- it seems familiar, even in its most extreme.

This is the story of growing up and living with someone who seems unable to fully grab onto reality with both hands and the toll it can exact on everyone involved.

I met Susanna when I took a writing workshop from her in Montana. She's one of the most kind and generous women I have had the pleasure of meeting. I immediately bought her book and read it through in just a couple of days, which means I could not put it down. Many times people who write memoirs do so because they look back on a life that was very unusual and understand how it helped shape their thinking and decision making, sometimes to their own undoing. They know they have changed and wonder if their experience may help someone else. People who read memoirs are curious, sometimes because they have gone through similar experiences and sometimes because they haven't. Unfortunately, there are those in the latter category who read a memoir and than pass judgment on what they've read. They judge the writer.

This makes me wonder. What would a memoir be if the writer decided to write about only the things they thought would not offend, or the mistakes they think will be the easiest to stomach. That would be the opposite of what happened in James Frey's book, "A Million Little Pieces." He exaggerated some of his history, but his book still touched many lives and because of that, has value. Susanna has amazing courage and gave me inspiration to be able to tell my own story without the fear of judgment which would be sure to come. Her life is amazing and the fact that she is successful in career, marriage, and motherhood at such a young age after all she went through is truly remarkable to this reader.

This was a difficult book to read. I am not saying its was a bad book it kept interest pretty much throughout. I am not saying this woman was not abused, in some ways yes, but I do not think it warrented a book about it.

the majority of the time the author basked in money, expensive clothes, vactions abroad, and money at her disposal. I am not saying money made it alright, it did not but it takes the sting out of it and there were times when her Mother was kind and decent and cared, she had emotional problems but throughout I never doubted she loved her children very much and gave them pretty much the best money could buy, and yes money does help.

My good friend was a abused beaten child and it was much much more horrific than this sugar-coated book. Her father beat her black and blue with the belt and her three younger siblings, he did NOT drink it was his real true personna he did this cold sober. He locked the kids in closests for hours, even one time in the trunk of a car, he would take them to a dark deserted field and tell them to "get out" because they had done something bad that day {normal kids antic's nothing terrible} he would call them horrible names, chase them around hitting them swearing and worst of all he would, and I will descibe this slowly, make the four kids kneel on their knees on hardwood floor with their arms extended out for an hour, if they lowered there arms they would get backhanded in the face! Back in the 1970's noone cared, it was like "disipline your children as you see fit" neighbors would see the children getting chased around the front yard and never called the police, they were on their own. The mother tried to protect, he never hit her, but failed he was so mean nasty rotten evil noone could stop him, he never sexually abused them, thank God, thats one good thing, but the emotional physical and mental abuse have hurt these kids throughout life, damaged jobs and relationships and has brought on panic attacks, depression and anxiety, this man was truly evil, he is still alive, the mother died young, and is STILL at it, never missing the opportunity to verbally abuse and yell, they avoid him all they can and hate him to this day.

They did NOT have money growing up, lower middle-class, no nice clothes, no expensive vacations, no wonderful caring grandparents who intervened and helped, etc.... they were abused poor and it was terrible, hellish.

My point is other people have had it way harder than this author, she had money and lots of it and yes it takes away the sting, not all together I agree, but it made it easier, just to "fly away to france" or the bahamas when things got bad with the mother and I felt she never actually beat the kids bloody, they survived and they did it rich and had other options. The family I described had no other options, poor and beatup is a horrible childhood, and the fact the father did this cold-sober and did not take drugs makes it worse, it was real, not alcholism related and there were not "presents and disney world vactions" to take away the sting, just more abuse and hatred and to this day it continues, through they are adult and can stay away, I pray one day these children can heal and recover, but his hatred lives on as he lives on at age 70.

NO abuse is good and I am not saying this author had it great because she was so rich, I am saying it took away some of the sting and allowed them more options to leave. No matter how you look at it, money DOES help in everyway, its alot better to have money than not and in this case it helped. I am sorry the author suffered through I don't feel she suffered that badly, and as you read above others suffer SO much more. It turned out good for her good husband, beautiful baby, trust fund, money etc.. she will survive. Perhaps my friend should write a book about her hellish childhood and make lots of money like the author, at least her cries would be serious. The book is good, a good read, but life was not as awful as it seemed for her. Perhaps abused poor children should NOT read it, it makes their situations so much worse being poor.

In HER LAST DEATH, Susanna Sonnenberg achieves what I believe the very best memoirs can accomplish. She paints a vivid, living picture, not just of a life but of her relationship with her manic but unbalanced mother, and she does so with prejudice and personal perspective. Memoir is not autobiography; at its very best, the genre tells us not the facts and objective observation of the events. Memoir takes us into the heart of the author's experience, and it is its very subjectivity that gives it power. HER LAST DEATH brings the reader into Sonnenberg's internal world, a tumultuous place where both a mother's love and her sanity are always in question.

Sonnenberg doesn't flinch from the light when it comes to examining her own stumbles and weaknesses, and when an understanding of her troubled mother's psyche eludes her, as it often does, the author doesn't engage in conjecture or armchair psychoanalysis. Instead, she allows us to experience this inexplicable world with her, and in the end, we are left not so much with a sense of who her mysterious mother might have been, but rather whom the author has ultimately become.

In the course of facing a difficult past and its ramifications for her future, Susanna Sonnenberg has shown herself to be an extremely talented writer, and I eagerly await more from her.

I was very disapointed with this book halfway through. You can't help but dislike the author who seems to have no redeeming qualities. Predictable and self-serving, she seems to think she suffered more than her younger sister whom she abandons in a time of need. Lets hope "Her Last Death" is her last book!

I don't think I've ever read a book where the reviews were so extreme - from those who loved it to those who were quite disappointed. Yes, this is a sexually graphic book. Yes, this seems to be a very honest book. Yes, there are some inconsistencies in the story. However, I was very impressed with the personal writing style. Susanna's acting out as a teen and young adult clearly seemed understandable. How many people who knew her had any idea of what she went though at home? I am glad that she told this story, even though it was quite disturbing at times.

I love memoirs and I found Her last Death to be hard to leave when I had to go to work, but I have a few quibbles.

The book started off wrongly in the preface where the author, Susannah Sonnenberg, warns us that the only "real" character in the book is her; everyone else has a pseudonym and people and events may be composites of characters and situations. That is not the definition of a memoir, in my opinion. Rather, I felt I was reading fiction into which the author had inserted herself. Therefore, I have no idea if what she wrote actually happened as described or if the people she wrote about, including most of all, her mother and sister and her wealthy grandparents, really existed. A memoir, at least since James Frey got reamed out by Oprah, is about real people and real occurrences.

I also must admit I didn't like almost all of the people described in the book, including the author most of the time. Her husband remains a complete enigma (leading me to believe he's boringly normal) but that he doesn't seem to buy into her dramas says a lot about him. Her father has some interesting qualities and more so as his neurological disease has progressed. The mother, of course, is singularly distasteful in almost every aspect and it seems she has similarly doomed the younger sister. Her story is one of rampant, unrepentant child sexual abuse, passive aggressiveness, and deceit intended for no other purpose than to hurt her children in ways I haven't seen anywhere before. Everything she did was so inappropriately perfused with sexuality in dangerous and unspeakable ways. Should the author rear her two sons to be honest, decent, responsible, and loving adults, that will be a monumental credit to her ability to overcome her dreadful family.

If readers discount the story and the people populating it as mostly fictionalized, then they will experience a well-written, fast-moving "novel" about a quite unsettling family they should never hope to meet.

excellent book, keeps you wanting to stay up all night long just to finish it.

Reading this book, the story of Susanna's upbringing and early years of marriage and motherhood, was like reading someone's diary. Her Last Death is the intimate purging of an extraordinary life with Mummy--perhaps one of the most unfit and reckless characters ever to raise children. What's remarkable is that Susanna not only lived to tell the tale, but also ultimately seems to have turned out to be quite "normal." She has certainly realized her potential as an educated and talented writer.

It's the good writing that got me through this quick read. It certainly wasn't the subject matter. I kept asking myself, uh--WHY am I reading this? It had a definite Mommie Dearest revenge factor thing going for it, but the author's love for her mother came through as well, as she struggled to find herself while standing in an overwhelming shadow. I think it made me appreciate my own childhood, and marvel at the power we have over our children in mapping out the world for them.

The mother she names "Daphne," (the author makes it clear in the front notes that all names but her own have been changed), is in a word, outrageous. Living a sexy, single-girl life with two baby girls in tow, she consistently puts herself, along with her drug and sex addictions, ahead of the responsibilities of motherhood. From a daughter's eyes, the reader senses Susanna's conflict of love and betrayal as she bestows the horrendous details of her childhood. Namely, her mother's constant offerings of cocaine and alcohol to the adolescent Susanna, parading an endless line of lovers through their apartments and hotel rooms, her need to seduce each and every one of Susanna's friends (particularly the boyfriends), and explaining orgasm and introducing birth control when her daughter was hardly beyond puberty. It made me feel both sick and very sad.

Susanna divulges several of her own poor choices on the way to her life, as well as her initial struggles with motherhood. She may not be the most likable character walking the roads of Montana; however, due to the way she was raised, she has evoked this reader's sympathy. Overall, I found this to be an interesting and unique memoir and would enjoy reading future work by Susanna Sonnenberg.

From the author of The Things I Wish I'd Said.

I found Sonnenberg's "memoir" to be nothing but a tirade against her mother. It did not read like a cathartic exercise ... it seemed rather more a revenge novel. Sonnenberg's mother is indeed a toxic presence to the author and it is with good reason that Sonnenberg eliminates her from her life. However, Sonnenberg spends too much time casting blame for behavior that she herself engaged in with absolutely no apology or reflection. The reader is led to understand that the author has changed her ways but is it simply because she found a man loyal to her? There is little to no mention of the journey of the mind that must have taken her to this present life. That piece that is so lacking here is what makes the art of memoir great ... especially if you're not going to name names.

What a shock to read this book! It shows that a child's love for a mother is all forgiving, no matter what suffering, neglect and abuse they have to endure. It is an amazing story of survival and hope. Well written, better than any suspense story because it is real life.

I liked this book well enough I suppose. The first half to me is a lot different and more interesting than the last half. I wish the ending had left more closure I guess you could say. ..

This was one I could not put down. The writing is wonderful and the stories are heartbreaking. I recommend it to everyone!

Brilliant. Mesmerizing. I know people with crazy mothers. I know people (including myself) who have done everything she describes in this memoir. Forget the reviewers who have the audacity to criticize and judge Susanna. Applaud her for the courage it must have taken to reveal all that pain on the page. Bravo.

Apparently, reading thru the reviews here... I am the only one who read this and in the process thought: "Yup. Unfortunately, This Mother is an unfortunate, textbook example of a childhood sexual assault victim... classic symptoms."?
Now, this is never explicitly stated by the author- never really investigated as the Mother is manic, fraught with lies on top of more lies on top of a deep desire for sexual attention in any capacity- positive or negative- but the Mother's behavior combines with uncontrollable, manipulative desperation. She can only view herself (and therefore her daughters) in a sexual capacity- it is the only thing she has confidence in; This takes on horrifying facets and overwhelms this volume.

I believe the writer, Ms. Sonnenberg when she describes the drug use she grew up surrounded with: Many of my peers had comparable experiences (including myself) where the liberated, neo-hippy parent was the one buying the first drink, offering the first joint and/or hit... "I'd rather you get it from me than some stranger on the street" I heard over and over again... doesn't make it right, and no, I do not approve or desire to emulate it... but it happened frequently. Good for you if that was not your experience, but it's not uncommon.

My most substantial annoyance with this book is how all problems are blamed squarely on Mom:
Promiscuous as an teen and then as an adult? Oh well, that is my Mom's fault for raising me. The flagellation gets old. It gets predictable and tiresome.
C'mon, when you take charge of your actions and responsibilities you heal and become a better person. This doesn't relay or resolve that to my satisfaction.
The author at finish of book is solidly distracted with a new marriage, hard work, poverty and yes, attempted redemption thru motherhood- but I'd genuinely like to read more about her healing process. So many pages dedicated to her chaotic upbringing- and yet not much more than snapshots on healing... the writing ability is there... the finish is not.

Lastly, This is written well, but if you are expecting titillation or detailed descriptions of sordid sex you will be dissapointed. Perhaps this contributed to the number of negative reviews... or at least... so some of the review history of the disappointed critics I clicked on might attest! This is not a romance. This is not an erotic book. It is not an instruction manual. There is a love story... but not as you'd expect.

I am shocked at the distasteful reviews of this book! It is an absolute masterpiece!!!!! I am sorry that so many of you have lived behind rose-colored glasses (and in glass houses) that you cannot appreciate the way the rest of the world lives. WAKE UP!!!!!

I am in a book club and this book was chosen for this month's read. I just started reading it this week and I am almost finished. I hate to put it down. It is hard to believe what this girl's life was like growing up. I think it is a great book and would definately reccomend it to my friends.

Just because the woman writes well and is now married (for a second time) and a mom, are we really expected to let her off the hook for her cheating, lying, and generally deplorable behavior for the first 2/3 of the book? I don't think so. There's two sides to every coin, but the tarnished side of this bad penny is enough to make me want my money back.

This book grabbed my attention in the first chapter, and kept it throughout the book. I never wanted to put it down. It was definitely a real page turner. I couldn't wait to see what story the author was going to tell next. I would recommend this to everyone!

OK, Susan Sonnenberg grew up rich. No getting around it. But while a wealthy upbringing usually colors a memoir in a distinctively self-pitying shade (usually through the author trying to hide it), this memoir actually acknowledges that while the money made her life comfortable, it didn't mean her life was free of torment.

What is perhaps most striking about the eloquently expressed reflections and memories here is how Sonnenberg can write about what has lacks a definable quality...it isn't quite sexual abuse, though sexually inappropriate; it isn't quite forced drug addiction, but availability of drugs makes a terrible living environment; and what do you call it when your mother teaches you that sex is the key to everything but then tries to protect you from the men that want to have sex with you?

The biggest surprise as I read was how much the author seemed to have in common with the author of Sickened, whose mother suffered from Munchausen's by proxy. The two women are worlds apart, and yet suffer for their mothers' sins. They are also both exquisitely crafted memoirs, both trying to make sense of strange childhoods, and trying to find who they are as adults separate from their mothers.

Her Last Death will remind many of us of our relationship with our mothers . While Susie s account of her mother
portray a woman with a very strong personality subject to dramatic mood swings it is apparent that she and her mother are too alike to get on with each other as Susie grows up .
This book chronicles how their similarities which used to bond them eventually drive them apart .

It is very rare that I will take the time to write a review on a book. In this case, however, I felt compelled to do so. I found the author to be one of the least sympathetic protagonists that I have ever read. The only possible joy that I have is that when she closes her eyes at night, she is tormented and agonizes over her miserable lie of a life. Not only does she sleep with just about everyone (ORTHODOX RABBI), she murders life with little regard to consequence. She has an abortion, kills her puppy, and can't be bothered to visit her dying mother or her dying first love. She then whines how maybe it wasn't the Queen Mary's final voyage that brought her to America.. it was another ocean liner that sailed many more times. WHO CARES. Her mother lied a lot and had a drug problem. She was promiscuous and may or may not have slept with her friends. Does this give any reason to live a life so vapid and self pitying? Oh.. I feel really bad for you. You travelled the globe and never had to want for money.. lived in mansions in Barbados and NYC.. and were given every possible leg up because of legacy and nothing that you earned for yourself. Boo hoo. I am certain that the only reason this pile of garbage was even published was that her last name was used to guarantee a contract.. maybe a favor to one of her deceased relatives. I've never seen an example of someone flying higher on borrowed wings, and then complaining the entire time about how bad she had it. My only hope is that her children read this book and decide to cut her out of their life when they get old enough to realize how selfish, self-pitying, and self absorbed she is. The only reason that I gave this book 2 stars is that it kept me awake with anger and compelled me to write a review of it. If you dislike people with a sense of entitlement, arrogance, and pity, avoid this book.

* Spoilers*

Like other reviewers, I was drawn to "Her Last Death" because it sounded like the kind of dysfunctional family memoir that keeps me turning pages. I appreciate anyone who can honestly look back at a horrendous childhood. It's so much healthier than glossing over appalling human behavior. Having read and loved "Running with Scissors" and "The Glass Castle" I was expecting something similar.

Initially, I loved the book. The New York in the '70s setting, the outrageous Daphne (truly the mother from hell), the shocking revelations. Soon, though, this seemed like a story stretched very thin. The bulk of the book is one sexual exploit after another, each one slightly more shocking than the last. Several, such as a seduction of brothers and of an orthodox rabbi, seemed fabricated. By the time Susanna was a faux lesbian in Missoula, I'd had enough.

As if sensing the reader's boredom, the author ends the tedious sexual exploits and shifts into her own struggles with motherhood. The parallels are worth plumbing... is parenting so inherantly difficult that Susanna can forgive her own mother for her mistakes? This section (making up roughly the last 70 pages) has some bite to it. However, Sonnenberg can't resist a cheap ending, which gives a false sense that she has learned from her mother's mistakes and has exchanged her mother's life of decadence for traditional domestic bliss. I'm am skeptical that she has really overcome the values she was raised with.

As I read this book, I couldn't help but remember the book from the 70's, "My Mother, Myself". This daughter, in this reader's opinion, becomes what she seemingly most abhors, her mother. By recreating for the reader, her numerous sexual exploits and manipulative behavior of those around her, she begins to sound more and more like her mother. She does not seem particularly interested in redemption or self-realization and I found the book troubling for this reason. I kept asking myself why a mother of two would put all these details into her book - won't her children grow up and be subjected to the same salicious details of her life as she was to her mother's life? I am pretty shocked that her husband was willing to go along with this book's publication.

I found this book to be compelling and fascinating. Compelling because of the strength and seeming veracity of the narrative - and fascinating for its even-handed dissection of the damaging narcissism of the author's mother, which plagues and dominates her childhood. We root for Susana, weep with her and utlimately exult in her fragile, imperfect liberation.

This is full of self-absorbed people...she wouldn't smoke pot, but it was okay to snort cocaine...the promiscuity....she knew better...the privileged don't live like us normal folks...no morals, etc...

This does contain spoilers, so if you haven't read it yet and you are definitely going to stop now!

I read this hoping for another Glass Castle. I really did enjoy it, it kept me intrigued almost to the end. BUT the author is so self absorbed, she makes herself out to be a victim turned sex addict all the while patting herself on the back. Her teacher says she is the sexiest woman he's ever seen, basically every man she meets has never had better. The end was really disappointing, I kept thinking of her poor kids if they ever read this! She makes her marriage seem fake, talks freely of an abortion, as well as her frustration and dislike for her oldest son. Then she speaks of the son fondly for the next couple of chapters, but the other son was referred to as 'Daniel's baby brother'
She thinks marijuana is awful, but cocaine is fine, she's taught how to masturbate at 8 and even gets her own Penthouse magazines. It wasn't Glass House but I still recommend it.

Spoiler alert: There is so much in this book that some of you might find truly ugly, I'm going to have to write a warning review.

I was going along with this story as best as I could manage with all the promiscuous and pointless sex, both from the mother and the daughter. It was shocking and ugly when the mother kept sleeping with the daughter's friends -- although later we find out this may or may not have happened at all.

Then it got very distasteful when the daughter begins an affair with her high school teacher, right under his wife's nose. People get arrested for behavior like this, and the wife, when she finds out, seems to accept it. Women's lib takes a giant step backward.

We have a brief interlude of Susanna sleeping with the same men as her sister, and then she finds her true love, and they get a puppy. Here's where I nearly put the book down for good. The puppy bites so they have it euthanized. Wow, that's brutal, but it gets worse. She gets pregnant, and after one day of pretending they're happy about it and one day of pretending they're going to abort it, the husband votes to abort it and she does it! Even though she doesn't want to! Women's lib takes another giant step backward. Now I am really disgusted. This woman has put down a puppy and a baby within a couple of chapters. Then just a few months later, the husband decides NOW he's ready to be a father. Meanwhile, Susanna gets a part-time job as a counselor at an abortion clinic, so we get to wallow in the misery and horror of that. (So if you believe in saving puppies and babies and not seducing teenagers, you're going to hate this book.)

This is one damaging, nasty family. The mother is a liar, drug addict and nymphomaniac and carries on sexually in front of her two daughters like a latter day Britney Spears, and the daughters turn out no better, except we're supposed to like Susanna at the end when she mothers two little boys, keeps her marriage together, and lives on a budget in Montana. And who cares if she doesn't go visit her mother in the Bahamas after she has a car accident (and incidentally, doesn't die, so I don't understand the title. I wouldn't spend the money to visit her either.)

Sonnenberg is a "writer," and I put that in quotes because she writes like someone trying a little too hard to be a writer. This trashy life is told in overly genteel, descriptive prose and although she realizes this kind of life is not normal, I have a hard time seeing her as a victim, and even now, you can't be sure she believes her own behavior was as ugly as her mother's. If all this was going on in a trailer park instead of luxury New York condos, it'd be just trash.

It almost seems like a B movie, it's so over the top. Even the adulterous history teacher she had the affair with dies a horrible cancer death, like a 1950s movie retribution. I'm not going to be surprised when this does become a movie starring.....who? Too bad Shirley MacLaine is too old to play the mother now.

My other frustration is both mother and the daughters are always judging men on whether they're good in bed, but not once is it explained what the definition of good in bed is. By what standard are they judging? And the three women are positive they are excellent in bed, so terrific, they can get anyone they want...and they do. And I'm not sure how they're doing this either except making themselves absolutely available for sex wherever whenever with whomever. What makes them good lovers? Sonnenberg doesn't share, so you don't even learn a trick or two from this ghastly story. And yes, we have a lesbian episode, too.

So, in summary, if you have problems with any of these topics, don't read this book:
Mothers and daughters sharing lovers
High school teachers seducing their students
Dogs with behavior problems being euthanized
Abortion

I enjoyed the creative way the book was written but doubted some of the contents.

This book illustrates the hope and change that can come out of tragedy.
A mother raising daughters in a chaotic world, whether because of addiction or mental illness, and near-sociopathic self-involvement would crush most children. Sonnenburg uses her life experience with an emotionally vacant mother to resurrect herself and create a new life for herself and for her children.

Sonnenburg's ability to create her own life, and finally accept her mother's inability to 'be there', reminds me of Alice Miller's words; "...for the human soul is virtually indestructible and its ability to rise from the ashes remains as long as the body draws breath."

This author shows courage in finding her own adult life out of harsh experiences. When family members are destructive, it is okay to leave them, in my view.
Then healing can happen.

The book is well put together. Very readable and an inspiration to anyone who has destructive parents (OR siblings) in their lives.

Worth reading !

This book is actually quite boring, I thought it would pick up but it never really did.

Susanna Sonnenberg led a luxurious life as a child of privilege. When she was three years old, Bob Dylan lived next door. Susanna's parents divorced, and she moved to a deluxe New York hotel with mother Daphne and sister Penelope. Daphne drove a taxi, often bringing along her daughters in order to get bigger tips from fares. She began to date, was charismatic and popular, and had fabulous stories to tell, some of which were probably true.

Daphne took six-year-old Susanna, along with Penelope, on a trip across the country. Along the way, she confided that she had stolen coats, sleeping bags and jewelry for their trip. She also told Susanna that she had leukemia and that she only had a few months to live. Susanna, horrified and sad, asked what would become of herself and Penelope after Daphne died. Daphne brushed off the question, telling her daughter that there was a good side to being terminal --- such as being able to charge anything on credit cards but never having to deal with the bills.

When the trio returned to New York, Daphne informed Susanna that she didn't have leukemia after all; the hospital had mixed up patient charts. This just proved to be one of many of Daphne's uncountable, manipulative falsehoods. Meanwhile, Daphne seduces a married neighbor, Colin, but takes the girls on a vacation with Colin's best friend, Hugh.

Although Susanna yearns to be closer to her father, Nat, he is emotionally distant with his daughters, suggesting they call him by his first name. Nat suffers the early stages of multiple sclerosis but manages to take the girls to cultural events. At one point, Susanna accompanies him to see Orson Welles films. He sternly tells his daughter not to speak until the movie has ended. As Nat watches the film, a man sits by Susanna, stroking her thigh. Afterward, when Susanna reveals to her father what happened, he simply tells her what to say next time: "Take your hands off me!" Nat considers the problem solved, but Susanna is sad that he doesn't act outraged or try to find her molester.

As Susanna grows older, her mother's erratic behavior escalates. She abuses Susanna physically and emotionally, but these episodes are followed by interludes of irresistible magnetic charm. Yet Susanna grows wary and then warier as her mother seduces her boyfriend, abuses drugs and constantly lies. Susanna's own behavior, particularly with men, begins to mirror her mother's. If "as the twig is bent, so grows the tree" is a true saying, then how can Susanna ever learn to find honest love and live an honorable life?

HER LAST DEATH is in many ways an unsettling read, partly because of the matter-of-fact tone in which Sonnenberg relates her mother's manipulation and abuses. It is also a page-turner, as the reader hopes for resolution, healing and resurrection for the author, who leaves us with a satisfying, not overly neat, conclusion.

--- Reviewed by Terry Miller Shannon [...]

This book is down hill after the cover. I understand the basic premiss but it just doesn't pull it off . stay away from it

Wish I had read some reader reviews prior to my purchase. The subject interested me, the beginning chapters drew me in. However, the emphasis on descriptive sex was repetetive as well as disturbing. The repetition of these scenarios with unending details didn't have a purpose. Mid-way through the book, I considered throwing it out. I was content with the beginning and the ending.
Unsatisfying overall. There are some good things here, but it got drowned out by alot of sex. Maybe that was the point.

A brutally honest memoir from a brilliant first-time author. Sonnenberg grabs you by the throat on page one and never lets you go. She has truly plumbed the depths of her soul to bring us this astonishing book. I can only gape at the courage it must have taken to sit down in a quiet room, to travel back to all those exotic, yet painful places and drag the memories up and out. Some are delicious and naughty. Some are horrifying. Most will shock you. But the beauty and subtly of the sentences she crafts will leave you wanting more. When I came to the end, I was weeping and cheering for her at the same time. Amazed that a book could elicit such a reaction, and wondering how she not only survived her childhood, but managed to come through it with so much strength, self-assurance and wisdom. I found myself unable to put this book down. If you liked Tobias Wolff's THIS BOY'S LIFE, this girl's life will top it.

I love to read memoirs...I have a controlling mother so of course I rushed out and bought this book. I even convinced a friend of mine to go out and buy the book. I was truly fascinated with the trials and tribulations of Susanna Sonnenberg's life. However, I can't describe my disappointment at the abrupt ending to this very detailed book. I felt like everything came to a screeching halt and I was left hanging. Have no expectations and it is a good read.

addiction, dysfunction.. etc.. This wasn't what I had hoped for.. but she is a good author... I would probably check her out in the future.. Not my fav .. just okay

I was pretty disappointed by this book. It's not that the writing is bad, actually it's technically quite good, it is the story that I had no interest in whatsoever. It's interesting to me that the author is so completely opposed to her mother, but gives her father a free pass for almost the same type of behavior. In addition, I got very tired of reading about this spoiled, narcistic, self-absorbed, morally bereft, snob. How she found a nice husband to marry her is beyond me.

I really enjoyed this book. I am not going to go into details about the story. I am sure you have already read what it is about. It is a fast read. I read the whole book in just a few days. As I was reading it, I kept thinking it will make a really good movie.

It took me a couple of chapters before I really "got into" this book. The memoir was a very honest account of Ms. Sonnenberg's life growing up. It was difficult for the reader to relate to a mother who was both charming, and a total liar to her children, and everyone around her. What an accomplishment to rise above this and strive for independence , and a normal life. She certainly gets my vote for a real survivor! Very well written.

Loved this book. The only downside is that I got thru to too quickly! It is a compelling read that focuses on an unhealthy mother/daughter relationship. Very touching.

It's been a long time since a personal memoir stayed with me for so long after I turned the last page.

Sonnenberg is living proof that money and privilege don't insure happiness ... or even a glimpse at normalcy.

Sonnenberg's grandfather was one of New York City's most successful publicity machines. Her father was somewhat of a literary star, especially during the 1960s. He grew up in one of the city's most recognizable mansions, The Fish House, at 19 Gramercy Park South. He had a fling with Susanna's mother when she was 15, got her pregnant and married her when she was 16.

Sonnenberg's maternal roots are just as impressive, even though she changes their names, so we can't Google them for more background. Her maternal grandfather was a successful musician and wrote tunes for the movies. Her grandmother could have been Carole Lombard's twin. After the two divorced, 'Pasty,' as Sonneberg calls her, had houses in Barbados, London and Monte Carlo.

Forget Joan Crawford and the wire hangers. 'Daphne' was addicted to drugs, sex and rock 'n rollers. If Sonnenberg has written the truth, it's a wonder Daphne survived her addiction to morphine, cocaine, Valium and percodan, not to mention her binge drinking. She was hospitalized for mental meltdowns on numerous occasions. She taught Sonnenberg how to give her drugs with needles. When Sonnenberg was 12, Daphne gave the child cocaine, telling her it was important for her to know the difference between quality cocaine and powder that had been "cut," or watered down. Daphne seduced her daughter's boyfriends. She had sex on Daphne's bed at boarding school. She punched her daughter in the stomach, a lot.

And, there was really no one to protect the young, sensitive girl from the maniac that had given her life.

How Sonnenberg ever found her way through the mania to a healthy relationship is a miracle. Now living in Missoula, Montana, with a loving husband and two young boys, she has written a glorious accounting of her time in hell. Her ability to tell her story with a precision-like insight is true testament to the triumph of the human spirit.

Warning: This book is not for the faint of heart or the easily offended. Daphne's drug use is just the tip of the iceberg. Until her marriage, Sonnenberg used her sexuality to get what she wanted and to fill the gaping holes in her heart. She was promiscuous. It's a wonder she wasn't an alcoholic or druggie to boot.

I suspect this book will garner a lot of attention come awards season and I'm sure Hollywood will scarf it up, even if the screenplay would have to be rated X.

Not the best book I've read, In fact I thought it was awful. I'm sorry I really hated it, too much of her sex life and nothing to hold my attention.

What kind of daughter gets the most dreaded of all phone calls --- "Your mother's been in an accident, she's probably going to die" --- and doesn't drop everything to rush to mom's bedside?

In this case, a smart one.

Eternal vigilance, someone said, is the price you pay for not turning into your parents. And that's for garden-variety neurotic folk like you and me. For the kids of parents who should never have become parents --- the hard core druggies, the passionate narcissists, the spoiled rotten rich --- it's much harder. To hear the stories those kids tell is to wonder: Why didn't you self-destruct?

Of these horror stories, Susanna Sonnenberg's is a stunner. "It's official --- the worst mother, ever," one reviewer wrote, and I don't disagree. Susanna's mother abuses drugs so casually she mixes them with tap water before injecting her thigh, encourages her single-digit-aged daughter to masturbate, seduces (or pretends to) her kid's boyfriends. That she shamelessly drops names and makes her sick self the center of every conversation --- in this family, that's not even a misdemeanor.

The father's no peach, either. He becomes afflicted with multiple sclerosis, which buys him some slack later on, but he's already done his share of damage. Just one example: How do you justify taking your grade-school daughter to the movies and blaming her for doing nothing when a guy gropes her?

I say it all the time: We become what we behold. It doesn't matter what our parents tell us, we imprint who and what they are. So what are the odds that Susanna's teen years are about school and extra-curricular activities and making sure she gets into a good college?

Good guess.

Readers who don't like to read about lovemaking-without-love should stay clear of this book, because there's a ton of it here. And not just the mother. Susanna gets off to what, in her family, is a slow start, but by 16 she's doing it with her English teacher, and in her early 20s, she sleeps with anyone who crosses her path.

So, you ask, what's in this squalor for me?

First, redemption. Many of us believe that people don't change. But the last half of "Her Last Death" chronicles Susanna Sonnenberg's path from talented loser to wife and mother of two. It's not a pretty story --- there's backsliding galore --- but it's credible, and moving, and surely an inspiration to anyone who's lost and thinks there's no way out of the hole.

And then there's the writing. Susanna Sonnenberg puts you in the room and keeps you in the room. And something harder: She doesn't step back and judge. Was her mother bipolar? Reads like it. But Sonnenberg is too good a writer to turn her book into a tract about a woman who needed help and a family and culture that didn't know enough to provide it. And because she doesn't judge, we never catch a break. We're in it with her, begging her not to get engaged to the gambler who doesn't love her, willing her to break up with the chilly and controlling Brit, praying that she doesn't lose her first good relationship by confessing a meaningless lesbian affair.

Funny thing. Susanna Sonnenberg's grandfather --- the source of the money that started the chain of indulgence and sickness --- was Benjamin Sonnenberg, who more or less invented public relations in America. He commanded huge fees for expert spin; you could say that deception was the family business. Generations later, his granddaughter has told her story as harsh truth. Good for her.

"Daphne" was truly the mother-from-hell. Narcissistic/drug addled/maybe bi-polar, this woman really should have been erased from the gene pool years ago. Susanna's memoir is well written and, thank god, the author has recovered from her upbringing.

I found this book to be just too much information. All I could think of the last half of the book was that this woman has sons. Not a book I'd want my sons to read about their mother. I found her to be full of self pity and she never made the characters real. Why was the mother as she was? What about her past? Was she a a compulsive liar or was some of the name dropping true? Very confusing. I love memoirs and was very disappointed in this one. Highly recommend Glass Castle.

I'll admit that I blew through this book, and found many passages very well written, but it hardly merited a glowing NYT review and subsequent high praise. That, I'm certain, had more to do with the author's lineage than the strength of her writing. Furthermore, the emphasis on sex was often disturbing. What was the point of including such salacious details? My guess: the author thought it was literature, art....not sure I agree. Overall, it was at times both a good read and a taxing one. .

.

I was excitded to read this book after reading some positive reviews liken it to a truly excellent memoir, The Glass Castle.

I found the authors tone both pitiful and annoying. The characters even the mother and daughter where both one dimensional and under developed.

You never got a sense of why anyone was acting the way they were and the author failed to make it clear whether the mother was a pathological liar or telling the truth and had a grand life.

I was very dissapointed in this book and what the author to pull herself together and stop sniveling.

Its also depressing that she only finally found happiness by being with a man.

I mean does she not see the irony?

Dont buy this but check out the glass castle if you want to read about a truly horribel childhood and a woman who manages to make it on her own anyhow.