I had felt a lot of confusion as to what exactly BDSM was and why where people so attracted to it. After reading this book I now see that the lifestyle can not only be safe but actually enjoyable for us 'vanilla' folks (as they refer to none BDSM people).

This book is a great serious introduction to common practices, SAFETY, how and where you can meet people with similar interests. Also how to tie someone up, what tools can be used be used that are common household items as well as what to buy if you want more serious BDSM equipment.

The biggest surprise to me is BDSM is not just about inflicting pain on someone else but about so much more. Read it and find out 8-)....

"SM 101" is essential reading for those who practice or wish to explore an alternative lifestyle. From a practical standpoint this book outlines and describes safety first and foremost for all those who indulge at any level. It also takes a philosophical approach on what is accepted behavior after physical safety is addressed. BDSM play practiced by the uneducated can possibly lead to lasting detrimental psychological effects for both partners. This book describes many of practices and techniques used in a BDSM relationship, partnership or encounter. Overall the experience if acceptable to both participants can be rewarding in a spiritual fashion by bringing common desires to fruition. This book examines and guides the pursuers of these pleasures in a very logical and straightforward fashion.

For some years now I have heard tell of Jay Wiseman's SM 101. Over a decade after it's initial printing it seems to have become almost canon in the BDSM community. After finally reading it one can clearly see why. Wiseman's book is truly an exceptional work and in my opinion should be a part of every BDSM practitioners library. Weather you're someone with tremendous experience who has spent years in the scene or a novice who is just beginning to explore the world of BDSM this text is a very valuable asset to have. SM 101 is full of useful information that covers everything from basic safety, to techniques, to simple solutions to the various problems one might encounter in a session. This manual is a must read for Dominants and submissives alike. If you are looking for a practical, realistic, down to earth introduction to BDSM or if you're a seasoned player looking to expand your knowledge I can think of no better reading than SM 101.
-C.B.

Want to play whips and chains? Read this book first!
Seriously- the first half is safety, safety, more safety! Te Deum safety. But there's been a few bad accidents that could have been avoided by reading this book. There are reasons for avoiding certain things, and proper ways to do others.
About halfway through- the fun starts! This really is an excellent primer for anyone with Those Urges- you are not alone, and education is very important. Jay covers safe play, safety in dating new people, how to meet those new people, and what to do with those new people. The instructions get pretty detailed. A mesmerizing read for anyone, and very valuable education for anyone who wants to participate.

Want to play whips and chains? Read this book first!
Seriously- the first half is safety, safety, more safety! Te Deum safety. But there's been a few bad accidents that could have been avoided by reading this book. There are reasons for avoiding certain things, and proper ways to do others.
About halfway through- the fun starts! This really is an excellent primer for anyone with Those Urges- you are not alone, and education is very important. Jay covers safe play, safety in dating new people, how to meet those new people, and what to do with those new people. The instructions get pretty detailed. A mesmerizing read for anyone, and very valuable education for anyone who wants to participate.

I enjoyed reading this book. I am into the scene as they say. So this book is very informative for newbies like myself. This book gives you all the basics on how to get started if you are a Dominant Female or Dominant male. A must read!!

This is a really good reference book on most aspects usually associated with BDSM - perfect for beginners (who may not always be aware of how risky certain practises are and how - relatively speaking - safe other more conventionally "hard core" things may be). The author gives an excellent run-down on his version on the ethos of BDSM, and with so much experience of his own he seems well placed to do so. He also gives alot of practical advice about how to practise BDSM safely (emotionally and physically). I was especially impressed by his chapter on "basic basics" and "flagellation". This book is not perfect but it is still so good that I am giving it 5 stars. The things I did not like so much about the book were that (a) it hardly even mentions fisting, (b) the author is very scene based - this is not a big problem but it does mean that I filtered (by skim reading or skipping) probably about 1/8th to 1/4 of the text out (eg, how to find a partner/ local SM organisation/practise safe sex/etc). It has to be said that the fact that the author is so scene based is probably why the book is so good - Wiseman obviously draws from alot of personal and well sourced second hand information from friends in the BDSM scene.

Wiseman covers the ground pretty well and if you know nothing it's a place to start. He does as someone else pointed out err on the side of safety, but better that than be irresponsible. He has been around a long time and is respected within the scene, (although known for being a bit windy in his demos)Of course the whole "safe, sane and consentual" idea is a bit bizarre. Little that most of us do for fun is safe, and more hikers die every year than BDSM players. Personally, I prefer R.A.C.K., Risk Advised Consentual Kink, as do many others.

This book was an ok read. It is probably better for someone with a little bit of experience but if you have done more than just dabbled in BDSM, then this book is not for you. Not really for submissives either... This book is better for someone who is interested in being a dominant.

This book was very informative. It was a good introduction to SM. Very helpful.

This is by far the definitive book on the subject of extreme sensations.
It explains how and why people partake in this activity, and it's a great
way to hone or learn the basic human skills of being a Mench.
This book is highly recomended reading for everyone interested in life.

For years I had thought that my "kinky" thoughts/feelings were wrong. I harbored this incredible guilt and for many years, thought that I was doomed to hell for all of eternity for having these thoughts.

What's that have to do with Jay Wiseman's book? Well I'll tell you - it gave me a practical...down to earth perspective on BDSM. There are a myriad of - at times - confusing blogs, forums, websites, i.e. informative platforms out there that never really helped me wrap my head around it all. 101 helped bridge the gap between the fantasies and the reality; which then began opening a plethora of "doors" and helped solidify my interests. "You mean I can ACTUALLY do this?" I thought numerous times while reading 101. "Wow!" The "why" and "how" questions were given a simple, easily understandable pragmatism; the applications, the tools, the process and the techniques that one might incorporate into "play," thus bringing the fantasy from my head...into the bedroom, so to speak.

I highly recommend 101 to the hardcore "kinkster" and conservative "vanilla" types alike - it's one read that just helps dispel the often gregarious (even blasphemous) attempts at tarnishing the world of BDSM with conjecture, speculation and innuendo while giving you the practical tools/knowledge one needs to safely "play" in our dreams.

This was a great book. i bought it for my husband because it was one area that he was a little lacking.... well reading this book made me feel very tame.. lol but it was a great book. Highly recommend.

My wife has always expressed a very strong interest in this side of life, and though I have experience, what she wanted was beyond my normal range of experience. So I've done some extensive research and reading up on the subject over the last year. I must say, this book is by far the easiest to follow, understand, and enjoy of all I have read.

The author has a easy reading style and a good sense of humor, making fun of his mishaps as he himself was learning the lifestyle himself. This light and personal form the book takes makes it easier to understand and enjoy for the less or un experienced people out there.

There is extensive material on safety and finding a partner, two areas that will often cause beginners the largest problems. Following safety, the author provides a very well written chapter on the design and use of `scene contracts'. This is a very good idea to practice, since it allows both partners to know exactly what to expect and cuts down on unexpected shocks which can ruin a scene.

Another area that he provides a very good base of knowledge on is knots and rope bondage, which are two of his favorite activities and happen to be the area a lot people who get into the lifestyle come from. After all, who has not fantasized about being tied up and ravaged by our partner? If you have, then this book is worth buying just for those chapters.

Overall, I rate this book a must have for bdsm beginners or those people interested in tying up their partner. For more experienced people, the book most likely will provide a tidbits of knowledge, but is still worth buying. After all, it is always nice to be able to have an easy reading book to give to a partner new to the lifestyle.

This book has all the basics, what to look for, what to avoid. Not much in the way of the emotion of it, the head games, more the protocol, the more typical play. I hope everyone remembers that it is really about negotiation and that anything is possible. My favorite parts were the quotes, little quips overheard relating to BDSM.

This book has all the basics, what to look for, what to avoid. Not much in the way of the emotion of it, the head games, more the protocol, the more typical play. I hope everyone remembers that it is really about negotiation and that anything is possible. My favorite parts were the quotes, little quips overheard relating to BDSM.

This is a very good book for new commers to read. Lots of details and even illistrations of some things. I would deffinatly recammend it even to "expierenced" players.

This is a very good book for new commers to read. Lots of details and even illistrations of some things. I would deffinatly recammend it even to "expierenced" players.

I stumbled into the BDSM scene recently. I am lucky that I got to Jay's book early, although not early enough to avoid a few faux pas socially. Also, In his complete and very readable book I realised that some "experts" need to read it too, particularly when it comes to negotiation and safety. This book contains a lot of information lightened up with a few giggles. Worth the money even if you just THINK you may be interested in the subject.
Peter - San francisco

Great intro to what BDSM means and is all about. My interests are mainly in bondage and "giving erotic pain," and while I don't see myself ever having my own dungeon (too complicated with kids and my often >60 hr workweek but I love the idea!) and I'm too much of a monogamist to ever play with anyone other than my wife, this book is excellent for building a base of knowledge that someone can use to enter and enjoy BDSM in whatever level of involvement he or she might be interested. Dispels much of the myth and prejudice with which BDSM is viewed (good even for an "open-minded" person such as myself) - the dark, dangerous, abusive and freaky practice of perverts. It's funny to think of how many people are into BDSM and don't know it (ever given your sig other a little spanking, fantasized about handcuffs, or done a little roleplaying?). Not a bad place to start as far as bondage interests are concerned; once I'm done with this review, I'm going to buy the bondage books by Jay Wiseman and Midori. And I definitely liked the chapter on giving erotic pain. He takes a lot of time explaining how to be caring and considerate (as both a "top" and a "bottom"), and how to always play it safe. Much appreciated book, and a quick read despite so much useful quality information. If you're already very involved with BDSM, this book would probably be rather elementary, but then again, you most likely read this book a long time ago. Even if your interests are peripheral at best, this book will open your mind and if nothing else, feed your curiosity and educate you about a world that many of us didn't know existed.

This book was well-written. It's focus is on safety and it helps to keep one's mind open!

Of the half dozen or so SM books I own, SM 101 has to be my very favorite. Its a well balanced, easy to read, introduction into the world of adult, consensual BDSM. And one of the nicest things about the writting is that it isn't judgemental, even subtly judgemental, about any particular form of sexual expression. The chapters cover the basics of Dominance and Submission, rope bondage, impact play, entering the lifestyle and much more.

And for those expierenced players, Wiseman brings up many ideas and concepts that some of us hadn't fully considered. I would absolutely recommend this to anyone considering entering a BDSM lifestyle or for anyone who would like a good foundation in the basics.

If you are worried about way far out stuff being a part of SM, this should put your fears to rest, however it gets a bit boring, going over each item and issue a little too long.

Wiseman is a bit dry and academic, but don't let that turn you off to this really great beginner's manual.

This book is just fantastic for people who are new to BDSM (especially people who have unrealistic biases about "what we do"). I've been involved with BDSM since 2002, and I wish that I'd had this book back then -- so that I could let my vanilla friends read it to get a handle on the lifestyle. Wiseman explains the ins and outs with compassion and finesse, and his approach is refreshingly NOT gendered (unlike "Screw the Roses," which is decidedly male-top, female-bottom oriented).

There are no pictures, no "steamy" parts; it's all a very measured discussion of what goes on in power-exchange relationships. There are chapters on topping, bottoming, first sessions, whipping... the list goes on. Wiseman, a switch, offers advice and suggestions like a pro.

He even talks about common phenomena that seem to happen to all of us:
*top drop - that feeling that whipping somebody means you might be really messed up, even though both of you loved it at the time
*Monday morning rebound - where your play partner suddenly decides that he or she is not "into" it anymore, even though he or she had a great first session on Saturday night
*whipping flu - did you know that a heavy whipping can leave you with more than just bruises and a sore butt?
*And more!

If I were going to recommend a "first" book on BDSM, this would be it -- even over "Screw the Roses," "The New Topping/Bottoming Book(s)," and other recommended beginner's manuals for BDSM. These books are excellent reading, by the way, but Wiseman simply offers a wider and more professional approach to BDSM. If my mom found my floggers, I'd hand her this book.

My wife and I enjoyed reading this book that is both insightful and educational. We would recommend this to anyone who is curious about bondage and s&m as well as those who are looking to give it a try.

This book is a fantastic resource. It's not an erotic read, but it's bound to make your BDSM encounters much more successful. I'd read it carefully and memorize much of its advice- particularly the tips on safety.

Beyond its helpful advice for BDSM sessions, SM 101 also offers some personal touches. We get to hear a bit out the author himself, which lends his advice credence, and we also get a glimpse at the history of the BDSM scene in California's Bay Area. I recommend this book to anyone who's interested in pursuing any form of BDSM-it's just that good.

So i read this and did indeed learn a lot of what i sought, however i found it to be rather dry reading (reminded me of my college pscyh professor who had quite the monotone voice and thus rendered the most interesting of bits of pyschology into a monotonal monotony).

Regardlez, it's a good read for those new and or interested and i highly highly recommend it in spite of the need for a built in watering fountain...

~Kry Ky

As a novice to the scene, I was told by many (and read on many websites) that this was one of the first books I should read. And it definitely has its good points. Wiseman is an excellent writer, with a lovely style. Some of this book was a little amateurish, I wasn't a huge fan of the pictures, but the quotes on the side of the pages were fantastic and some made me laugh out loud. There is a lot of information in here, some of it really a little over my head (and possibly more designed for Doms rather than subs), but it is clear, factual and not sensationalized.
I'd recommend it and lend it out, although it's a little dry...

I found this book very informative with just the right hint of humor and personality of the author to make it an easy read. I really have to say the author has a real thought for even the most minor detail which I found fascinating and extremely helpful for a novice.

I read SM 101 a while back and was very impressed with Jay's effort to explain the fun game (for some) and lifestyle (for some) of Safety while participating in Kinky games.

Last year, my husband and I got to hear Jay in person. He is not only a fun presenter, the explained his scientific basis of testing for safety as well as esthetics.

Last month I was going to look up a specific item of interest and ended up rereading parts of the book because some couples new to kink were getting and giving incorrect information. Tnis book is my reference when I need safety knowledge or want some great ideas to start a kinky new exploration.

SM 101 is perfect for the newby as well as the seasoned player. Enjoy.