I wanted to like this book. I heard an interview in which Auslander read the first page or so, and thought it sounded really funny. As someone that grew up in what was, at times, an overbearing religious environment and a semi-dysfunctional home, I was sure I could understand, and laugh along with him.

But my, oh my, Auslander is angry. Very, very angry. And more so than the humor, this is what permeated this book for me. In many places, it completely washed out the humor.

Don't get me wrong, he's a funny man and knows how to turn a phrase for comic effect. There were moments I really, really enjoyed, and even one or two that made me laugh out loud. (Who names their kid peace?)

But I guess I was expecting something more like David Sedaris -- a man who really knows how to make the most of a screwed up and depressing situation.

Foreskin's Lament just left me uncomfortable, and possibly worried about Shalom's blood pressure. You just can't hang on to anger like that, can you?

...and indeed, he keeps you guessing. Well-written, heartbreaking. So amazing how he gets the reader to sympathize with his abusive father. I just have one critique, which is why I gave it four stars: How could someone raised ultra-Orthodox not know that a medical circumcision is "not kosher"? He participated in Blessing Bees, he can recite all 40 of the Forbidden Sabbath Activities, yet he doesn't realize that a circumcision is a ritual, complete with a *mohel* and blessings? C'mon...Sounds like selective amnesia to me, although who could blame him?

Auslander is incredibly funny in his "memoir". I originally came across him in a GQ article and had to read his other material. He provided some great points about God and "theological Abuse" in this book. His negative & nonstop thoughts are both hilarious and very universal. He is in constant fear of an angry God and his idiotic rambles and stupid stunts are only fodder for a great story.

Take a young child who relies on his parents for a fair-minded view of the world. Add a major dose of terror and uncertainty in describing an irrational, mean-spirited God who will strike you down if you walk four steps without a yamulke or dare to eat a McDonald's burger (as if God didn't have more important things to worry about). Sprinkle in liberal doses of hypocracy from abusive rabbis, teachers, and parents. It's a sure formula for a very confused, very angry adult.

We've seen it with Islamic fundamentalists...with certain Christian evangelists...and here's the Jewish version of the story. Shalom (his name means "peace" in Hebrew) navigates a rigid orthodox upbringing, where the simplest day-to-day activities -- eating, dressing, even opening a refrigerator door during Sabbath -- have the potential to bring down the wrath of God. Since, in many children's eyes, God equates father, it's no surprise that this fear is maximized because Shalom's father is physically and emotionally abusive.

Shalom Auslander uses humor (just like Augusten Burroughs, his advertising background has kept him in good stead; this is a breezy read in places) to reveal the downright silliness and ultimate harm of fundamental religiosity. His anger at his parents is very thinly veiled, and his desire to be a better father for his own son is poignant.

It's always been amazing to this reader that grown, intelligent men and women take ancient religious precepts at face value, without exploration or examination (Auslander quotes directly from the Talmud about a particularly gruesome torture for those who flaunt God's rules, for example). I urge those readers to pick up a copy of Christopher Hitchen's book "God Is Not Great". However, I suspect that certain readers won't be able to get out of their comfort zone and admit what Shalom Auslander already knows...it is nothing short of theological abuse to submit innocent children to mean-spirited, fundamentalist beliefs of ANY religion.

What a great read about a boy's life within a Jewish household. It is a sarcastic look at the double standards and tedious rules within his family's faith. Loved his perspective on the reality of strict religion and how it impacts the life of a boy living in a world full of temptation and identity.

Karen

Auslander grew up an ultra Orthodox Jew In Monsey, New York. This memoir is his rant against the strict rules of his religious faith. But most of all it is a rant against the vengeful, fear inducing God with whom he is raised. Auslander's rebellion includes the eating of 'traif', non-kosher food. The first time he eats a Slim Jim, purchased at a heignborhood community pool, he pukes into a garbage can. This doesn't stop his venture into the world of 'traif'. He indulges in Big Macs with milk shakes, pizza with pepperoni, forbidden marshmallows made with gelatin (a pork by-product). Will his marshmallow feast result in the death of his sister? He looks at porno magazines and wonders if this is enough to kill his father by being hit by a car. In essence Auslander thinks he is a very powerful fellow in God's eyes, as his Heavenly Father is sure to punish he or his family every time he violates one of the 613 Commandments by which Orthodox Jews live their lives. It seems as if God has nothing better to do in this world of poverty, disease and war than to watch over the doings of Auslander. This is hubris on a cosmic scale.

This rant can be hilarious at times. His description of his Yeshiva's Blessing Bee made me laugh out loud. But 300 plus pages of rant begins to wear thin. Leaving the Orthodox faith and his family, he finds himself a father obsessing over whether to circumcize his soon to be son. This is the Foreskin's Lament.

One doesn't have to be a trained psychologist to figure out Auslander's hatred of his Heavenly Father is related to his hatred of his drunk and physically abusive father. But instead of coming to a resolution of this with his $350 per hour shrink, he rails against the 'theological' abuse of God. The destruction of his familial relationships deeply saddens me. Similiarly it is implied that Auslander's wife, Orli, is similiarly estranged from her family but this is glossed over in the book.

There is much that is worthwhile here. Auslander is a Philip Roth on speed. I just hope he comes to terms with his rage. Otherwise every book this talented author will write will be poisoned by his continued rant.

His candor and wit are refreshing.
I,too,used to want to get out from underneath the gnawing suspicion that my thoughts and actions had consequences. But one word proved the existance of God for me. Israel. So while I'm a Christian and my perspective differs from Mr.Auslander's, I can still relate to his predicament. The persistant pervasiveness of the Book and the people of Abraham just can't be seen in any other culture on earth. And this despite just a bit of "opposition" through the years, shall we say. God chose them to communicate His truth and His plan in written form to solve the mess we're in since sin entered our DNA. It's been available for all to hear/read, take or leave, believe or disbelieve.

I may not like it sometimes. But, like Richard Gere cried in An Officer and a Gentleman, "I got nowhere else to go!"

(hey, of course Christians always get "preachy." Try and see it from our perspective, it'd be like being on the Titanic, seeing the iceberg and not yelling get in the boats. So if a Christian doesn't preach at you they just don't care whether you know God has a place in a lifeboat with your name on it. Indulge us. Or at least treat us as you would a crazy relation at a family gathering, with patience and understanding)

I loved this book, and found myself laughing out loud several times on crowded subway cars. Auslander manages to create humor and warmth out of painful childhood memories and an obsession with a vengeful God, and is clearly a talented writer. I had a hard time putting it down when it came time to go to work, or bed, and I really look forward to reading more from him.

This is one of the most disturbing books I have read in a long time. That is not a bad thing. I wonder if I would have the gumption to bare my life and my soul the way Mr. Auslander has in this story. He spares no detail. In fact, it is more of a personal exegesis than a story. Although it focuses on the idiosyncrasies of growing up in an orthodox Jewish environment, what he says is applicable to any similar theologically literal upbringing. I know Catholics who could tell similar stories, and some fringe evangelical Christians too. I recommend this book. It is unforgettable.

My book club selected this, and although I'd never heard of it, I went along, checked out the library's copy and dutifully started reading it. It turned out to be one of the funniest books I've ever read--and I'm not easily entertained. I literally couldn't put it down and read it in just a few days. I enjoyed it so much, I plan to buy my own copy so I can read it again. It probably helps to have been raised Jewish of some stripe, but even the non-Jews in the book club loved it. So did the woman who keeps kosher.

I also gained some insight into the pervasive negativity I see in certain members of my own family. Although we were not raised Orthodox, I finally understand that their sense of doom and judgment isn't just cultural. It isn't just because my parents witnessed the Holocaust (albeit safely across the Atlantic as American citizens), or because they lived through the Depression. I'd never realized before reading this book that it actually has religious roots, even though my family isn't especially religious.

Anyway, if you have a wry sense of humor, love irony and absurdity, then you're bound to love this book. Shalom Auslander, thanks!!!!

The author's honesty is remarkable re: the inner workings of this community, one I'm familiar with. If you liked this book, let me strongly recommend, "Yiddishe Mamas: The Truth About the Jewish Mother" for another honest eyeview of this maligned stereotype.

And it's a real problem for me. (Something like that.)

I can deeply relate to this book, but from another angle. I was not raised religous, but I am Jewish and had some traditional friends, as well as attended Hebrew School leading up to my Bar Mitzvah (out in lovely Forest Hills Queens).

The problem began in earnest when I visited Israel and spent time with some newly-ultraorthodox cousins of mine. They convinced me to check out a b'al T'chuvah Yeshiva (returnees) -- free to attend. I was supposed to spend a month there, and I wound up there for almost a year.

It's been years and, like Shalom, I believe in God. I have spent many a night and day praying, and many a Friday night at a Shabbos table, and many an hour learning with a Chavrusah about this rather deep religion, complicated, and layered - we call Judaism.

What a complicated and intricate body of work it comprises. How hard to pin-down.

And yet, to live it, it winds up being simplified. In the end, what Shalom is bucking at, railing against -- are the fences of Judaism. Many of the fences were erected by the Rabbis to keep "us" from "them," and to keep halachah and particularism going. We are a particular people -- not a nation only, not a religion only, not a culture only. You can join, but it is going to cost you. Hopefully, you will also find it brings value, even dare I say it, "truth." But you may have to look pretty hard, and then you may wind up ocassionally looking again, and again.

I do think Judaism has brought much to the world -- I do think that in some sense everyone has a "Jewish" mind now. There are books and essays that get in to the Jewish contribution to the world, and I think even Shalom, who is so smart and so funny, has probably looked at that aspect of things.

I couldn't help after reading but thinking: Shalom would make a great Rabbi.

Just for the record, in my foray in to Judaism, I have met and learned from amazing men - Rabbis - mainly in Israel. I am such a cynic type, and I will NEVER forget these guys.

The more I read this book (which is quite funny at times), the more I felt sorry for the author. He sounds like a very disturbed and angry person that his $350 per hour shrink isn't really helping. If the facts about his family are even remotely true (and based on what Auslander writes about how to make a book interesting, that's doubtful), then he's blaming G-d when he should be blaming his dysfunctional family for all his issues.

Pity that his son will have to grow up with such a bitter dad. And I wonder how Auslander will feel if his son imitates his dad's behaviors - drugs, porn, stealing and other charming activities that are not the fault of Jewish observance. They are more likely caused by an ODD (oppositional defiance disorder) personality disorder. Shalom, get a better shrink who may be able to detect this aspect of your personality, and maybe then you can again become the person you were in Israel (probably at a place like "Ner Jake"), because for that brief point in your life, you actually sounded happier and more well adjusted about things. Which just goes to show that Torah is truth, and not the way your readers are going to end up interpreting things here.

Actually, I'm still reading the book and laughing my butt off. If there is a god or a God and he is the punishing kind, so far, his punishment has been making apple juice coming out of my nose. If, however, god or God is a benevolent one or One, then it was wonderful watching my bed ridden wife asking me to stop reading because it hurts to laugh and my non-Jewish nursing aide ask to read the book after I finish. Summing up, it's a freaking mitzvah.

"Wow - they really did a number on you."

It's a line Auslander's wife and mine both say with a frightening regularity. Perhaps that's why I immediately resonated with this book, despite my lack of Orthodox Jew-ness, growing up in a completely different environment (West Virginia instead of New York) and other massive differences.

Then again, I was raised Catholic and have worn a Flying Spaghetti Monster T-shirt to Mass. Under a sweater, just in case someone (human or divine) noticed and decided to strike me down.

The humor I found was not the humor of slapstick or manners. It is the humor of deep, dark irony. It's the wry smile as the last thing that could go wrong *does* go wrong.

This is a darkly humorous book, and painfully honest. The zingers are real - but they apply to you more than you think.

You can either laugh or cry.

One thing is for sure.

God is laughing. Even if He doesn't exist.

I must say that this was my favorite book of all time. Finally an author who speaks to me! I cried when it ended. Looking forward to reading about his next 20 years! Shalom is funny, angry and intelligent. Well written to say the least. I laughed and felt wildly sad for him. Life throws some serious curve balls at us. Some fo us deal with them and fall apart, others deal with them and find humor in their reality. EXCELLENT READ! if I could give 100 stars I would!

Most reviews, both positive and negative, of Auslander's memoir emphasize his often venomous critique of his Orthodox Jewish upbringing (particularly as embodied in his anger-consumed father) and of traditional Judaism in general. While those elements are undeniably there, what's often overlooked is the young Auslander's occasional but pointed feelings of compassion for his father, whom he portrays as not only a victimizer (of his family) but a victim of ostracism and scorn from his congregation, even when he builds it a Torah ark. (He has rather less compassion, however, for his mother, who appears solely as a nagging, guilt-wielding stereotype; only once is her evident depression and disillusionment with life touched on.) The author also expresses heartfelt empathy for others with similar backgrounds and conflicts: "A little foreskin nation," he calls them, "trying their best to start over, build up, move on."

Furthermore, Auslander's main target throughout is neither his family nor his onetime community, but his God. Unlike many individuals who rebel against their strict religious upbringing, Auslander not only continues to believe in God's existence and constant surveillance, but is literally obsessed with the Deity, in ways alternately comic and tragic. I'm reminded of Harold Bloom's Jesus and Yahweh : The Names Divine which similarly expresses, albeit with much less rancor, an inability to leave his ancestral God behind.

Although much of the book's content will resonate more with Jews, especially those with some Jewish literacy, than with non-Jews, I recommend this bitter, funny yet surprisingly compassionate memoir to anyone--religious, anti-religious, or undecided--with an open mind and heart.

This book is an uproariously hilarious memoir that shows a truly common feeling of people, especially children with respect to the restrictions of orthodox Jewry on how one should live their life. The various sins that one should not commit are highlighted in terms of Kosher dietary laws, working and other activities not allowed on the Sabbath and desecration of the body.

Auslander truly captures the feeling of people who are subjected to all these conditions from birth and how they resent them and then how they resent God himself. Guilt plays a large part in the life of Jews and the lifestyle they should lead. How this guilt is imposed on Jews and how they are made to feel responsible for the entire Jewish populace through their actions and life styles is showcased in this text.

Without any doubt, this book is the best depiction of the feelings of the absurdity that young Jews experience as they are forced or at least feel forced to abide by with the peer and parental pressures that are put upon them. For a very much lighter side look at this practice, this book is very highly recommended and very wonderful to read. All readers interested in comparative religion should give this book serious consideration on their reading list.

If you are a thinking person of any age, you need to read this book. The narrow minded reviews are from Orthodox Jews who can't take criticism.

This book is extremely personal for me as it is validation. I too was brought up in Monsey and experienced much of what Auslander describes, albeit without the abusive father.

If you think he's exaggerating, be assured that he is not. The endless rules, the stifling community, the continuous guilt - it's a reality for him and so many others who are true to themselves.

Most people from such communities don't wrestle with their questions for whatever reason. Perhaps some have a placid personality and don't question at all. The pressure to just do what you've been taught to is crushing.

All I can say is bravo. And I hope he finds peace. I'm on my own journey and I know how hard it is.

This is, by far, the most entertaining book I've read in a long time....Watch out, David Sedaris, you have competition! I couldn't put this book down. It's a real page turner that will have you laughing so hard your eyes water. This is a must read. I hope Shalom Auslander realizes what a true talent he is.

Shalom Auslander's memoir is the story of his relationship with the Hebrew God ("an abusive, belligerent god, a god who awoke millennia ago on the wrong side of the firmament and still hasn't cheered up''), a volatile, drunken Orthodox father, and a fastidious, strictly observant mother. Auslander rebelled against the social isolation and repression of his given community, and he draws off his fierce anger to write a witty, cuttingly sardonic memoir. His lessons are not uniquely Jewish; rather, his story will resonate with those familiar with fundamentalists of all kinds.

Did anyone notice that all the Rabbis who are characters in this "memoir" share names with American pop-culture super villains, mostly from James Bond movies and comic books. The two exceptions share names with comic book writers.

From James Bond, Kahn (Octopussy), Goldfinger (Goldfinger), Grunther (On Her Majesty's Secret Service) and Blowfeld (spelled Blofeld in the series, Ernst Stavo Blofeld is the head of the criminal organization SPECTRE in several Bond entries).

From the comics - Napier (Jack Napier, aka Joker, is a master criminal from Batman), Blonsky (Emil Blonsky, aka the Abomination, is the enemy of the Incredible Hulk), Kragoff (Ivan Kragoff, aka the Red Ghost, is the enemy of the Fantastic Four), Lehnsherr (Eric Lehnsherr, aka Magneto, is the militant mutant terrorist from the X-Men), Osborn (Norman Osborn, aka the Green Goblin, is the enemy of Spiderman), Wint (actor Maurice Dean Wintplayed the Shadow King, another bad guy from the X-Men).

With a yeshiva faculty like that, it's no wonder he has problems

... Auslander might be his name. But hey, if you don't know who David Sedaris is or can't fathom what might be possibly funny, ironic or sadistic about religions education, stop reading. If you're easily offended, have no sense of humor or talk about God--referring to a fine collection of so-called best-selling books by so-called best-selling truth tellers--you shouldn't read this. But, if you wrestle with Him or Her and torment each other ... only to feel guilty about it later, this is your salvation.

Auslander is irreverent and searingly honest about his relationship with God and his family. In some ways, reading this reminded me of fantastic and wicked version of Jean Shepard's tale, A Christmas Story. You've seen the made-for-television version. (Aside: Auslander's neurotic stream-of-consciousness is certainly not a made-for-television tale. But, wouldn't it be great?) You may laugh out loud or look away in pain as Auslander stumbles into his greatness (or into a stack of porn), but you'll keep on reading. Why? Because you recognize what he's talking about. His thoughts may reflect your own, but only here will they have new life. And oh my God, you'll laugh. A lot.

This book provides great insight into the Jewish mind. Now others can begin to understand the guilt and fear that the "Chosen People" have lived with for centuries. The book is beautifully written, funny, direct, sweet and thought-provoking.

As a non-Jewish atheist, I wasn't sure if I'd be able to relate to this book by a formerly Orthodox Jewish man who still believes in God, despite harboring intense vitriol toward Him. But because Auslander's memoir juxtaposes deadpan humor with heartbreaking vignettes of oppressive family life, even the outsider can't help but be drawn in. From the sins of eating non-Kosher Slim Jims to the great struggle alluded to by the book's title, the author does more than introduce us to the culture of his youth, he envelops us in it. As we come to know the protagonist and his relations, we begin to brace ourselves when Auslander's abusive father raises an eyebrow, and feel pangs of guilt when his mother invokes the Holocaust to coerce her son into being more observant. In the end, we find ourselves hoping the author will somehow find peace of mind, or at least another book deal.

This book will be offensive to most orthodox Jews. Nevertheless Auslander's description and insights into this elite clannish community is casutic as well as humorous. Auslander is not you average everyman. He suffers from acute anxiety in reference to his origins, beliefs, sexuality, etc. Wrestling with God takes on a new level of personal drama.

A singular point of view among memoirs. Caustic, sarcastic, very funny venting of anger by the author toward his family, God and upbringing in Orthodox, New York world. Thank God he found what seems to be the perfect woman to help him escape. A sense of humanity and humor lightens the anger.

I must suspect some of the negative reviews must come from disgruntled family members and Monsey Jews. This book pulled me in and took me away from it all and into the bizarre yet fascinating world of the orthodox Jew. Ignore the others. Read this one.

A comical read and a tragic one; yet thoroughly enjoyable! Like "Beware of God" it gives insight into the internal workings and mind-set of the ultra-orthodox Jewish community. But more generally, it mirrors the internal brain-washing and mind-shackeling that goes into forming any exclusionary group; be it a sub-sect theology of Jewish, Moslem, Hindu, Christian, Mormon, etc., etc.. Poor Shalom has outwardly wrested himself from the all-encompassing group and its myriad of rules. But God still has a firm grip on part of Shalom's soul, making him miserable still. He still argues with Him, takes Him to task and wrestles with Him like any God-fearing Talmudic scholar. That's the book's tragic undercurrent.

A wonderfully humorous young Jewish guy growing up as a doubter within a highly religious environment. His plaints to a God who seems to be MIA are full of the anguish of his peoples' victimhood stretching 2000 years while God seems to have been napping.

Thus, humor leavened with bitterness, or the other way around.

Shalom Auslander ("Peaceful Outsider") writes and amazingly amusing book about his orthodox upbringing and his rejection of this training, but hesitates in offending the "God" that he rejects. I expect that I enjoyed it more because I shared a Jewish upbringing, but I also expect many raised in a deeply fundamental environment who have consciously "strayed" since then might also share some of the amusement and uncertainty so amusingly described by Mister Auslander.

After a furious start with incredible mixes of bold and subtle humor, occasionally bordering on the almost tasteless - but only almost - the book in its middle piece somewhat loses its momentum to peter out towards the end in a lament over an almost unruly adolescence.

Auslander made me remember those irritations about God: is He a merciful and loving God or a cruel and vengeful father? The author's dialogues - or rather monologues - with God are brilliant in their straightforwardness and .in taking His word serious - and literal. They reminded me of my strict upbringing and evoked the bewilderment about all these contradictions of a God of mercy and revenge. He wonderfully describes an intelligent, curious - and frightened boy.

Auslaender wrote this as his biography -maybe a bit early for a man his age. A lack of distance to those years following the childhood somewhat darkens the brilliant start. He gets lost in a review of his adolescent, moderately rebellious years and the career as a (reasonably successful) shoplifter and dope smoker. Less would have been more here.

The story of his "relationship" with God during the time he spends in Israel is most disappointing. While his reflections on his early childhood are humorous and full of insights and clarity, they turn infantile and murky once he describes his stay there. As he writes notes to be stuck into the Wailing Wall in Jerusalem as messages for God, his lament truly becomes silly. It reads as if not even he himself had written that.

Auslander rekindles the initial fire in the last part of the book in his musing over whether he should circumcise his son, but it does not make up for the center section of the book.

Yet, I would still say: go for it! For a skin, pretty good!

Shalom Auslander was abused by his father. In response, he wrote this screed attacking God and Judaism. The book is written in a breezy style. It is kind of like hearing "Protocols of the Elders of Zion" being read on "This American Life".

In a Jewish Telegraphic agency interview, Auslander is wearing a pendant with the name "Acher". Acher is a Talmudic figure who turns against his former Rabbinic colleagues, overseeing their violent deaths at the hands of the Romans. In a New York Times interview, he portrays Orthodox Jews as "Crips" while everyone else are "Bloods". Auslander's identification and characterization illustrate what happens when anger turns to hatred.

This book is not anti-religion; it's religion as seen by a very gifted child. His trials, tribulations and incessant worries are both sad and hilarious.

A must-read.

To cut or not to cut, that is the question asked by a reformed orthodox Jew who can leave orthodoxy in his mind but his emotions stay attached. With a continuous dialogue with a God that he is not sure even exists, Mr. Auslander takes the reader on a rollercoaster ride through his fears of retribution by a vengeful God to his moments of joy with his family.

This book rates only a 1; however, your website made it a 2 without my consent. Problem is that the material is so poorly written, rambling, streamofconsciousness, redundant thoughts and obscenities with no cohesiveness, no plot, poor organization. This angry man who has such a problem with his guilt-ridden dysfunctional Judaism has a point which I'm not debating. Perhaps if he learns to write, create a plot and flow in the words, and stops describing ad-nauseum his sexual obsessions likened to an emotionally retarded teenage, and attend classes for writing, he might then produce a book which is alive and readable.

Think he needs some help from the God he rejects for this monumental endeavor.

There are not many books I have read that will make me guffaw as much as they will challenge me on my life's philosophies. This book is equally satisfying on both accounts. The humor is first rate and uniquely fresh, while the omnipresent theme of man's/woman's personal relationship to God made me stop and think about my own history on that account. If you consider yourself to be religious in any way or have struggled with whether or not you are, then you need to read this book. And even if you have never found yourself questioning or believing, you will still be much entertained. I look forward to enjoying a great deal more writing by Mr. Auslander.

I hope the author reads this since his pain is shared by a fellow traveller and the only major issue that I have in regard to his transparency is the idea of making money with intellectual honesty from a world that remains as fundamentalist in thought as the one he equates Orthodox Jewry with and more so a world where Jew haters remain, basically a world where the perennial conflict between universalism and parochialism will always rear it's ugly head and if the author in his own Jewish way does not find a solution he can live with it and be happy he will be forced into a world of total isolation where he is and must make a choice as Nietzsche did, or retreat into his limited box and family cocoon and feel the additional pain of some Jewish Spinoza outcast unable to communicate to either a Kantian G-D or the illusionary G-D we make in our image that is as real as one that proof if possible would prove.
I strongly advise the author to read Hannah Arendt's life story as a way to shed light and to grasp the nuances of this conflict he so correctly feels.
Religion and politics can be a deadly cocktail indeed.
Buddhism and Jewish hope collide into a clash that is not bridgeable as is the difference between immortality and eternity.
Is the issue one of airing one's dirty laundry in public with a goal of making a dollar on this whole agnostic orphan in history gig as Paul Cowan of the Village Voice described it many years ago in explaining his odyssey.
Or are we looking for ways to deal with our pains and isolation as any reader of Spinoza would argue by seeing that "nature abhors a vacum" and G-D is G-D as we are what we are.
Like the author I also went to many Yeshivas and was abused by some rabbis, being kicked into closets for days, expulsions, basically feeling the outcast, hurting my parents, like a rolling stone gathering no moss, an outsider in need of warmth and finding it in insulation with Existentialism, Dylan and the The Grateful Dead.
None of us are bad kids, just thoughtful,youthful and rebellious, in need of questions to be dealt with,wanting to feel existence and frowning upon hypocrisy.
You see, if indeed the Rabbis(All Parochial Religious Leaders for that matter) are honest and understand that Truth proclaims Itself without coercion, perhaps then like Moses, Abraham and the other prophets that followed, we can view them not as Prophets Of Doom and obedience but Prophets whose "discipline" is indeed worth learning from as we interpret their messages and humble ways as positive and somewhat majestic as a tapestry of our own personal trip that is livable, worth communicating and somehow I sense the author seeks.

Auslander cleary has reason to be angry at his father but vents his frustration at G-d, throwing the Bible and Monsey in for good measure. How classic. How boring. An alcoholic, abusive father can really wreck your life... I don't know too many people wrecked by having to wait six hours between veal and milk. Do you?

I read this book and thought it was great. I grew up in a similar environment and attended similar schools. I know all of the authors cousins whose names happen to be Shalom. Auslander may be a pseudonym because it means from the hinterlands or outsider. The book captures the spirit of this "quasi" society perfectly. The rabbis are mostly shlemazels who can't earn a living doing anything gainful. The juxtaposition of a man who can fashion lumber into useful items and the rabbis is nothing short of brilliant.
However, I take issue with the part about Uncle Nathan (Norman). Uncle Nathan worked his way up in a really tough system and deserves more credit than he gets. He is a really sweet guy without a mean bone in his body. He was 150% devoted to YU and built it into a financially solid institution. Before his arrival, the lights went out in the Science building periodically, because the electric bill hadn't been paid. He deserves a triplex, driver, maid and greeter. Uncle Nathan is an institutional legend who comes along once in a few hundred years.
I noticed that most of the reviewers are not members of the "crowd". That is very sad. The "crowd" has become ever more right wing and can't take criticism or a joke. That is a sign of something that is very wrong. I found the way that dad, the Ark builder, was treated to be poignantly true. Incredibly, my dad built an ark at his factory and presented it to his Minyan only to have someone come along and place a Parochet (cloth) over the front and claim that it was his donation. The "group" is one tough group of people and rightfully has been designated "Am Kshei Oref" (People with a tough backbone).
This book needs to be read and discussed and there needs to be more intergroup dialogue, not less. Congratulations for stepping over the imaginary line in the sand that no one dare cross.

Now that I've listened to the interview on NPR (Teri Gross on Fresh Air which was a good listen except my "check engine" light came on as I drove and they've outlawed in CA driving while talking on cell phones and there was no place to pull over to tell this massive blast of new troubles to figure out a course of action as I envisioned the car blowing to bits, this after going over to see my student hit by a car...he is 6) and I know so well, know, the Oprah POV that all books must be "exactly true" I feel safe in saying I wanted to read this one ASAP. So I ordered and in about five seconds it got here. It got here before the engine vapor lock got fixed and relocked even.

I wanted this if only to read a really true memoir.
This is it. Nothing but facts. No hyperbole, no using one's imaginative or stylistic skills. Literal. All the way. That's essential here. Get that down. It wrote itself I'm sure. Check the black squiggles. It says it. It happened. Relax Oprah, you can put this on the Booklist and never look back. And what it says isn't a glowing review for the Almighty. Or family life either as it turns out, at least not his which sounds like the alternate universe version of mine but I am not telling about Vacation Bible School just right now Kookaburra. Not really.

And I agree, I haven't laughed like this since Portnoy's Complaint. Somewhere I heard or read that about the book. Good comparison. Well, okay, Seize the Day got me too. Catch 22, Mr. Sammler's Planet, Rembrandt's Hat...several kind of floated by my mis-firing synapses. There are a few traditions at play here in this work I think....hum. Well, certainly if you read sometimes you might know this.Oh, wait, that's right it's a daily log of facts. So strike that.

It seems this completely historically accurate memoir work has a lot to say to me. Me. Read a few previous reviews to get the kinds of names that calls up. I'm a person who has also failed miserably to "shake God" and not doing so well putting a pretty awful Dad life behind me. Yeah, another loser. I guess. I say this cringing at a few reviews *ouch*. (I must say however there are a few moments reading when my "who had a worse dad" scoring got a little touch and go, I'm still considering my family trip to Williamsburg and the time I was left five hours in front of the movie house at five with no ride versus weighing that bloody nose on his brother)

I'm thinking about gifting this one, I really am.

Mostly because it made me laugh. But....as a Sarah just what do you expect?

Yes, I thought this was a very funny book, a fascinating way to handle the worries of becoming a parent,absolutely, an excellent way of trying to reflect on insanity in families, lives, beliefs, bad luck, the way the mind distorts and sees a God with some strange ways and in the process gives a good bit of information that is insightful about how he was raised. And it's even possible for me reading to take the bitter away and find at the core a man struggling with the same life, dealt cards, dice rolls, fears, childhood, becoming a parent after having a less than thrilling example of it clutching every brain cell you have, and also the personal "I" loneliness we all experience. With black humor and in a form that is a creative construction. Didn't I once learn the best way to channel these harsh aspects of life was with the creative drive we have inside? I need to think. So apparently do some others.

I had to come back and add this. Growing up in a situation where nothing, and I mean nothing ever "worked well" or "worked out" it's a place I've occupied too. Why on earth any mom tolerated any of this simply floors me. How awful to be victim to two ill people. And that I hear in the book. I really do hear it. It would seem looking for the next nightmare, this is the way we think. (Good old days when just driving down the street introduced the possibility of a father screaming obscenities at your 65 year old 6th grade teacher over her driving at the stop light, or ordering a meal at a restaurant with a friend's sister as waitress causes her to burst into tears as your father harangues her)...where every single thing you look forward to normally as a child is a thing to dread, and not "being seen" or "upsetting anyone" or "fixing and placating" your norm ...well...if you know this place you know that it shapes you forever. It's rather remarkably brave to try to tell anyone,in artform a risk, as life is determined you must never tell this, never make anyone look at it, just accept it and "move on" and maintain silence at all costs. How utterly remarkable to speak to this not only within a family but within a construct of a creating being making a book. To look the unfairness in the face.Say it happened to me, hurt me but didn't completely leave me destroyed. Not at all. It's this I think I find the most intense and real here. And for that, having been in shoes a bit like that....this book manages to find humor and well, I enjoyed that. I find that great.

Pretty good read. I just finished it in about an hour which was considerably easier than the several hours spent before starting it when I was carrying a few thoughts all by myself. Like, why haven't I heard from my daughter today? It may not be a read for everyone. But it is a funny good book.

Now that I've listened to the interview on NPR (Teri Gross on Fresh Air which was a good listen except my "check engine" light came on as I drove and they've outlawed in CA driving while talking on cell phones and there was no place to pull over to tell this massive blast of new troubles to figure out a course of action as I envisioned the car blowing to bits, this after going over to see my student hit by a car...he is 6) and I know so well, know, the Oprah POV that all books must be "exactly true" I feel safe in saying I wanted to read this one ASAP. So I ordered and in about five seconds it got here. It got here before the engine vapor lock got fixed and relocked even.

I wanted this if only to read a really true memoir.
This is it. Nothing but facts. No hyperbole, no using one's imaginative or stylistic skills. Literal. All the way. That's essential here. Get that down. It wrote itself I'm sure. Check the black squiggles. It says it. It happened. Relax Oprah, you can put this on the Booklist and never look back. And what it says isn't a glowing review for the Almighty. Or family life either as it turns out, at least not his which sounds like the alternate universe version of mine but I am not telling about Vacation Bible School just right now Kookaburra. Not really.

And I agree, I haven't laughed like this since Portnoy's Complaint. Somewhere I heard or read that about the book. Good comparison. Well, okay, Seize the Day got me too. Catch 22, Mr. Sammler's Planet, Rembrandt's Hat...several kind of floated by my mis-firing synapses. There are a few traditions at play here in this work I think....hum. Well, certainly if you read sometimes you might know this.Oh, wait, that's right it's a daily log of facts. So strike that.

It seems this completely historically accurate memoir work has a lot to say to me. Me. Read a few previous reviews to get the kinds of names that calls up. I'm a person who has also failed miserably to "shake God" and not doing so well putting a pretty awful Dad life behind me. Yeah, another loser. I guess. I say this cringing at a few reviews *ouch*. (I must say however there are a few moments reading when my "who had a worse dad" scoring got a little touch and go, I'm still considering my family trip to Williamsburg and the time I was left five hours in front of the movie house at five with no ride versus weighing that bloody nose on his brother)

I'm thinking about gifting this one, I really am.

Mostly because it made me laugh. But....as a Sarah just what do you expect?

Yes, I thought this was a very funny book, a fascinating way to handle the worries of becoming a parent,absolutely, an excellent way of trying to reflect on insanity in families, lives, beliefs, bad luck, the way the mind distorts and sees a God with some strange ways and in the process gives a good bit of information that is insightful about how he was raised. And it's even possible for me reading to take the bitter away and find at the core a man struggling with the same life, dealt cards, dice rolls, fears, childhood, becoming a parent after having a less than thrilling example of it clutching every brain cell you have, and also the personal "I" loneliness we all experience. With black humor and in a form that is a creative construction. Didn't I once learn the best way to channel these harsh aspects of life was with the creative drive we have inside? I need to think. So apparently do some others.

I had to come back and add this. Growing up in a situation where nothing, and I mean nothing ever "worked well" or "worked out" it's a place I've occupied too. Why on earth any mom tolerated any of this simply floors me. How awful to be victim to two ill people. And that I hear in the book. I really do hear it. It would seem looking for the next nightmare, this is the way we think. (Good old days when just driving down the street introduced the possibility of a father screaming obscenities at your 65 year old 6th grade teacher over her driving at the stop light, or ordering a meal at a restaurant with a friend's sister as waitress causes her to burst into tears as your father harangues her...where every single thing you look forward to normally as a child is a thing to dread, and not "being seen" or "upsetting anyone" or "fixing and placating" your norm ...well...if you know this place you know that it shapes you forever. It's rather remarkably brave to try to tell anyone,in artform a risk, as the entire group of humans in life is determined you must never tell this, never make them look at it, accept it and "move on" and maintain silence at all costs. How utterly remarkable to speak to this not only within a family but within a construct of a creating being in a book. To look the unfairness in the face. It's this I think I find the most intense and real here. And for that, having been in shoes a bit like that....this book manages to find humor and well, I enjoyed that. I find that great.

Pretty good read. I just finished it in about an hour which was considerably easier than the several hours spent before starting it when I was carrying a few thoughts all by myself. Like, why haven't I heard from my daughter today? It may not be a read for everyone. But it is a funny good book.

Now that I've listened to the interview on NPR (Teri Gross on Fresh Air which was a good listen except my "check engine" light came on as I drove and they've outlawed in CA driving while talking on cell phones and there was no place to pull over to tell this massive blast of new troubles to figure out a course of action as I envisioned the car blowing to bits, this after going over to see my student hit by a car...he is 6) and I know so well, know, the Oprah POV that all books must be "exactly true" I feel safe in saying I wanted to read this one ASAP. So I ordered and in about five seconds it got here. It got here before the engine vapor lock got fixed and relocked even.

I wanted this if only to read a really true memoir.
This is it. Nothing but facts. No hyperbole, no using one's imaginative or stylistic skills. Literal. All the way. That's essential here. Get that down. It wrote itself I'm sure. Check the black squiggles. It says it. It happened. Relax Oprah, you can put this on the Booklist and never look back. And what it says isn't a glowing review for the Almighty. Or family life either as it turns out, at least not his which sounds like the alternate universe version of mine but I am not telling about Vacation Bible School just right now Kookaburra. Not really.

And I agree, I haven't laughed like this since Portnoy's Complaint. Somewhere I heard or read that about the book. Good comparison. Well, okay, Seize the Day got me too. Catch 22, Mr. Sammler's Planet, Rembrandt's Hat...several kind of floated by my mis-firing synapses. There are a few traditions at play here in this work I think....hum. Well, certainly if you read sometimes you might know this.Oh, wait, that's right it's a daily log of facts. So strike that.

It seems this completely historically accurate memoir work has a lot to say to me. Me. Read a few previous reviews to get the kinds of names that calls up. I'm a person who has also failed miserably to "shake God" and not doing so well putting a pretty awful Dad life behind me. Yeah, another loser. I guess. I say this cringing at a few reviews *ouch*. (I must say however there are a few moments reading when my "who had a worse dad" scoring got a little touch and go, I'm still considering my family trip to Williamsburg and the time I was left five hours in front of the movie house at five with no ride versus weighing that bloody nose on his brother)

I'm thinking about gifting this one, I really am.

Mostly because it made me laugh. But....as a Sarah just what do you expect?

Yes, I thought this was a very funny book, a fascinating way to handle the worries of becoming a parent,absolutely, an excellent way of trying to reflect on insanity in families, lives, beliefs, bad luck, the way the mind distorts and sees a God with some strange ways and in the process gives a good bit of information that is insightful about how he was raised. And it's even possible for me reading to take the bitter away and find at the core a man struggling with the same life, dealt cards, dice rolls, fears, childhood, becoming a parent after having a less than thrilling example of it clutching every brain cell you have, and also the personal "I" loneliness we all experience. With black humor and in a form that is a creative construction. Didn't I once learn the best way to channel these harsh aspects of life was with the creative drive we have inside? I need to think. So apparently do some others.

Pretty good read. I just finished it in about an hour which was considerably easier than the several hours spent before starting it when I was carrying a few thoughts all by myself. Like, why haven't I heard from my daughter today? It may not be a read for everyone. But it is a funny good book.

Now that I've listened to the interview on NPR (Teri Gross on Fresh Air which was a good listen except my "check engine" light came on as I drove and they've outlawed in CA driving while talking on cell phones and there was no place to pull over to tell this massive blast of new troubles to figure out a course of action as I envisioned the car blowing to bits, this after going over to see my student hit by a car...he is 6) and I know so well, know, the Oprah POV that all books must be "exactly true" I feel safe in saying I wanted to read this one ASAP. So I ordered and in about five seconds it got here. It got here before the engine vapor lock got fixed and relocked even.

I wanted this if only to read a really true memoir.
This is it. Nothing but facts. No hyperbole, no using one's imaginative or stylistic skills. Literal. All the way. That's essential here. Get that down. Check the black squiggles. It says it. It happened. And what it says isn't a glowing review for the Almighty. Or family life either as it turns out, at least not his which sounds like the alternate universe version of mine but I am not telling about Vacation Bible School just right now Kookaburra. Not really.

And I agree, I haven't laughed like this since Portenoy's Complaint. Somewhere I heard or read that about the book. Well, okay, Seize the Day got me too. There are a few traditions at play here I think....hum. Well, certainly if you read you might know this.

It seems this completely historically accurate memoir work has a lot to say to me. I'm a person who has also failed miserably to "shake God" and not doing so well putting a pretty awful Dad life behind me. Yeah, another loser.I guess I say cringing at a few reviews-*ouch*. (I must say however there are a few moments when my "who had a worse dad" scoring got a little touch and go, I'm still considering my family trip to Williamsburg and the time I was left five hours in front of the movie house at five with no ride versus weighing that bloody nose on his brother)

I'm thinking about gifting this one, I really am.

Mostly because it made me laugh. But....as a Sarah just what do you expect?

Yes, I thought this was a very funny book, a fascinating way to handle the worries of becoming a parent, an excellent way of trying to reflect on insanity in families, lives, beliefs, bad luck, the way the mind distorts and sees a God and in the process gives a good bit of information that is insightful. And it's even possible for me reading to take the bitter away and find at the core a man struggling with the same life, dealt cards, dice rolls and loneliness we all experience. With black humor and in a form that is a creative construction.Didn't I once learn the best way to channel these harsh aspects of life was with the creative drive we have inside? I need to think. So apparently do some others.

Pretty good read. I just finished in about an hour which was considerably easier than the several before it when I was carrying a few thoughts all by myself.Like, why haven't I heard from my daughter today. It may not be a read for everyone. But it is a good book.

Auslander's Orthodox Judaism has utterly no redeeming value. There is no theology in this book to argue with. There are no brilliant insights that one can counter. Only the rants of a really screwed-up guy, reveling in emotional handicap.

His witty blasphemies may amuse a secular audience, but that is not his primary objective. His book is designed to lash out at his father, and more broadly, to offend anyone who accepts the faith he so deeply despises.

Personally, Shalom, I wish you only the best. You no longer need to fear a vengeful God. You are now free to live the flip side of the Job paradox, "rasha vetov lo" - a wicked person living in bliss. You, your wife and son should only experience long lives of happiness, cheeseburgers, and all good things.

Maybe then you can leave us alone.

Auslander, Shalom. "Foreskin's Lament". Riverside Books, 2007.

Laughing at Religion

Amos Lassen

"Foreskin's Lament" is a very funny and very honest look at a man's struggle with his religion, his family, his community and his G-d. Shalom Auslander has a complaint and is not afraid to share it with us. He cries out against Judaism because his education about it was abusive to him. Auslander holds nothing back and he says what many think but can never bring themselves to say.
What the author has done here is theologically, through wry humor, deconstructed the Judaism he was taught and in its place built his own sense of values and morality. Undoubtedly this will not work for all but it obviously works for him. If it is possible to follow his method, it may, indeed, be possible to find a way to be closer to divine spirituality.
Auslander is a satirist who takes it upon himself to have a deep and hard look at the Jewish religion and as he probes it in order to come to a new understanding of both Judaism and himself. He was raised revering G-d and even when he left the community in which he was raised and educated, he finds that everyday he struggles with and against G-d.
In "Foreskin's Lament" we watch the author as he grows up in a very strict Orthodox community and how he rebelled constantly to the point that he was able to construct a new life without all of the traditional Jewish values. His youthful rebellion took various forms--from shoplifting a pair of jeans to walking to Manhattan on the Sabbath to watch a ball game. As he matures, so do his struggles to understand the concept of G-d. He was amazed at the forgiveness given out on Yom Kippur and how some profane blessings immediately afterwards. He eventually settled for a compromise in hopes that his new born son will grow free of guilt, struggle and doubt.
Auslander is an angry man but this is due to his struggles with the spiritual. He seems to be on an unending quest for truth and acceptance. At times, the book pinched a nerve in me as I am sure it will anyone who lived through a traditional Jewish upbringing in which the stereotypes in many cases ring true. I found many points of identification and there were sections of the book that pained me greatly. Somehow, Auslander's comic writing style eased the pain but underneath his humor there is a great deal of truth.
Undoubtedly there will be comparisons made between Philip Roth's Portnoy and Auslander does come across as being very angry and full of complaints. As Auslander cries out against Jewish theological "dogma", we get a look at ethnicity and cultural identity. The book is essentially a dialog between G-d and the author and from it we learn about how many truly insane people are espousing religious doctrine.
The book can be read on a variety of levels and therefore can be interpreted differently by many. What will guide the reader is the idea that he is free understand the text the way he chooses.

Shalom Auslander is an angry person who needs to move on.

He had some hard knocks growing up religious (as did many), but his arguments have absolutely no theological basis.
There are plenty of people who had it worse than him, but found the strength to move on.

His book is simply an adolescent crying out.

Anyone interested in this book should listen to Shalom Auslander's interview with Marty Moss-Coane; he was brilliant and articulate.

The memoir is a much needed revelation about abuse in the "hyperorthodox" community.
Anyone in that community who says the author's family was not typical should keep in mind that too many people in that community let this happen to those children.
Almost worse, the teachings and behavior of teachers in the book does appear too much in those schools.
The worst thing is how people who are NOT like Auslander's parents could allow their children to go to schools like that.

It's a shanda!

I don't understand why this guy hasn't moved on. He's obviously tormented by his upbringing, yet he remains in that world. For instance, he 'walks away' from Judaism, but has a doula attend his child's birth. HUH?? And he has his son circumcised, yet he had previously denounced the act as mutilation. He's obviously got some issues, so why is this a book?

This is the second book I have read by this author. The first "Beware of God" was a collection of short stories. I found it boring in the sameness of the message of each story.

This one is much better. I was raised of Godly and goodly parents. I have no trouble in worshiping a prime cause who is founded on my biological father, just bigger and more powerful and even more loving.

This book confronts me with the reality that most indivicuals did not learn about this Prime Cause in a home/family environment similar to mine.


To learn of eternal love from/by/with an Eternal Creator when Christian and Jewish metaphor is constantly parental--and your parents are far from ideal--is a big challenge. This book strongly reminds me to be willing to listen and support those who are working in this struggle.

I found it fun to read. Less than 5 stars because is it less weighty than the "Confessions of Augustine' But it is as much fun.