This is an excellent book full of interesting information and useful exercises. If you or your counseling clients want to make marriage work, this could really help. I bought the Kindle version, though, and now I have no access to the exercises.

I borrowed the book from the library and made some copies of the exercises. There are so many good ones, this turned out to be a lot of time and money spent that I wouldn't have if only I had bought the book in the first place.

So, my message here is buy this BOOK! Work the exercises with your partner. Pass it along to someone else, too. Buy something else to read on Kindle.

This is an excellent book full of interesting information and useful exercises. If you or your counseling clients want to make marriage work, this could really help. I bought the Kindle version, though, and now I have no access to the exercises.

I borrowed the book from the library and made some copies of the exercises. There are so many good ones, this turned out to be a lot of time and money spent that I wouldn't have if only I had bought the book in the first place.

So, my message here is buy this BOOK! Work the exercises with your partner. Pass it along to someone else, too. Buy something else to read on Kindle.

I first read this book some time ago, and I've read it quit a few times since. At least in parts. The seven principals of making a marriage work can be applied to any relationship. I've certainly tried to apply them in my life, to some success. We all need these reminders at time to help us get our thoughts and priorities in a relationship back on track. Regularly leafing through this book helps me to do that. While I didn't agree with absolutely everything the book says, it is certainly full of invaluable advice for all couples, and should be read by everyone in a relationship.

I also recommend...

The Five Love Languages: How to Express Heartfelt Commitment to Your Mate

How To Keep Your Man: And Keep Him For Good

I first read this book some time ago, and I've read it quit a few times since. At least in parts. The seven principals of making a marriage work can be applied to any relationship. I've certainly tried to apply them in my life, to some success. We all need these reminders at time to help us get our thoughts and priorities in a relationship back on track. Regularly leafing through this book helps me to do that. While I didn't agree with absolutely everything the book says, it is certainly full of invaluable advice for all couples, and should be read by everyone in a relationship.

I also recommend...

The Five Love Languages: How to Express Heartfelt Commitment to Your Mate

How To Keep Your Man: And Keep Him For Good

My Husband and I are reading this amazing book. It is enlightening, eye opening and it is a fabulous book for any relationship, not just marriage! A definite must get!

I was looking for some answers with my current situation, and I found more than what I hoped for here. It struck a great number of familiar chords with both of us, and has true to life examples than any couple will relate to. This is a definite "must buy" book for any married couple.
Other excellent and unique book for relationships is I Love You. Now What?: Falling in Love is a Mystery, Keeping It Isn't

I think this is one of the best books that I have read on relationships in trouble. Principle 2 - Nurturing your fondness and admiration and Principle 6 - Overcoming Gridlock are worth the price of the book. The book contains a lot of tests and exercises most of which are very useful and insightful. The book assumes that both the husband and wife are trying to improve their marriage. It also works to some degree if only one person is working on the marriage.
The author does come accross in the first couple of chapters as arrogant but he tones it down in the remaining chapters. It is only slightly distracting.

I read this book back when I was unsure of the relationship between my husband to be and me. We had been together about 2 years. When we took the life goals questionnaire near the end of the book, I knew that he was the one for me! We had the same relationship goals we both wanted to actively strive for. It let us understand each other better as well. It thus changed my life, since I was more confident of the success of our relationship, and sure enough, 5 years later, we are blissfully happy together!

I purchased this book for a friend, but decided to read parts of it before relinquishing it. It is well written and easy to read. I love that it is for couples that are in the midst of turmoil or couples that have a pretty solid foundation. I am going to buy a copy for my fiance and me for a guideline when we get even more comfortable together!

Its more 77 principles with its proper exercises. Gives you a down to earth overview on the matter. Not a magic book but will tell you that to improve the comunication and talk openly is not the final answer. Its been helpful to me, for my marriage and for my job as a therapist.(obviouly not a couples therapist).

Gottman is a Genius when it comes to male/female relationships. I would suggest that anyone even thinking about getting married read this with their significant other first!

Okay. So I feel that anyone who stops to think about life and peoples reaction and who takes the motto do until others what you would like others to do for you or treat others like you would like to be treated is pretty much set wthin the principles that make up 75% of this book. The other 25% I considered to be food for thought, nothing more. This book didn't offer me any significant insight though it did offer me some peace of mind.

I really enjoyed this book. It gave me a lot of insight and calmed my fears about relationships over 45.

This book is definitely interesting and the author obviously made a good research, but those exercises after each chapter are a little tricky when it comes to doing them with your partner. If you don't have a good communication between each other then it can be challenging and actually make you fight while doing exercises. So if you are reading this book to improve your marriage that's in trouble already, you might want to read the book by yourself, not involving your partner and involve him only in the end (do all the exercises) if you think you are ready. The author also warns you before the first exercise to answer questions straight and not comment on any of them, for example: Your husband asks you a question "what do you think excites me?" , answer directly what do you think excites him, don't say "Well, we don't have any sex so how should I know" or something like that. It's a recommended book.

This is a required book for our program and I found it very easy to read and supported my own observations that couples who have the best relationship know the most about each other and keep current with how their partner is doing at all times. This "love map" is very important and why be in relationship if you don't know your partner this well and care about your partner this much. Good book, good read.

Love this book, it is much better than I expected and exactly what my fiance and I needed to help us build good foundation for our relationship and to get to know each other better and better, It is a book we will reuse time and time again, going through the exercises deeper and deeper each time. Thank you for such a helpful tool.

My new husband and I were going through a rough patch and arguing too much, so we got this book and read it together. We got so much out of it, and things improved a LOT within just a week. There are worksheets and quizzes you can do, and lots to think about. But even if you just read the first couple chapters, you'll get a lot out of it. I very highly recommend this book to anyone in a relationship that isn't as loving and kind as they'd like it to be.

I think that this is a book that everybody in a relationship needs to read. It opened my eyes to several different aspects of my life and relationships. This book is truly life changing and I would recommend it to everyone.

I picked this book to save my relationship with my wife. As I read each page word by word, I was shocked to know something about myself; that I understood very little about my partner and conflict itself. The Love Lab guru, Dr. Gottman, explains generously that problems are perpetual and others are solvable. Each kind must be treated differently in accordance with the 7 principles. Without him, I don't know what I would do. I'm just happy I've read it.

My wife and I both found the research fascinating, and the conversation topics and exercises to be entertaining. I discovered she knew more about me than I knew about her!

This book provides background that helps you decide how your relationship is doing. There is information presented and lists that allow you to see how strong you are in different parts of your interaction with your significant other. After you discover where you are, ideas are presented on how to make this area stronger. Makes you stop and think about what is actually happening in your relationship.

Superb book. I am newly separated and fear the worst for my marraige as my wife has already moved to another country and had at least an emotional affair. Through reading it I realise I did everything that it tells you not to do - so Gottman would have surely predicted the result. I wish that I had gotten my hands on this a year ago.

I am not married nor engaged, but possibly could be soon. I ordered this book knowing Gottman's reputation. I figured that I might as well begin learning good patterns for marriage as opposed to having to change bad habits later. I really have enjoyed this book and have found the information very helpful and practical.

I'm sure others can relate when I say that I really don't know ANY couples who are "happily" married - not even my parents (married 38 years)well, MAYBE one of my brothers - the other brother is divorced. I've even had a very long term engagement that failed. Not only have all of my romantic relationships failed, but they have all failed on bad terms. I spent alot of time being angry at relationships and had even given up on them because I didn't believe that "normal" courtships would never exist for me.

Recently, I decided to take the bulls by the horn and face my demons because I have started a new relationship and I want it to work this time (without the nagging inside feelings). Once I looked my heart in the face (lol), I realized that I just didn't know how to be in a healthy relationship because healthy relationships are not what I was raised around and it's not what I encounter on a day to day basis with others and it is DEFINITELY not what is depicted on television - so this is what I did.

I turned off the TV, stopped paying so much attention to negative relationship images, and I started researching with this idea in mind - "I want a healthy relationship. I want to break the cycle - Just show me how". God knew that I was ready, so I was lead to this book. I ordered the book from AMAZON and all I can say is WOW! This book really hits the nail on the head. I could TOTALLY relate to all the signs and symptoms talked about; especially in Chapter 2. It's like years of pent up apprehension about what has gone on in my parents' & grandparents' relationship and mine just melted away. I feel that I hold the solution to my problems literally in the palm of my hand. I feel as if now I have a fighting chance to have the long lasting loving relationship that I've always wanted, but had pretty much given up on. I can now look back at my failed relationships and forgive myself and my partners for whatever happened because now I know better.

I've also read Why Men Love Bitches and Why Men Marry Bitches. I highly recommend these 2 books as well because they have helped my regain my dignity as a woman. The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work has restored my confidence in romance. With God, confidence, dignity, and the skills needed to make a relationship work - I just can't lose.

I was one phone call away from a divorce attorney. We had been under counseling for months. Nothing got better, only worse. Our counselor suggeted this book. It changed our lives! Please read this book before you make that phone call!!

This guide provides activities for motivated couples to do together that will strengthen a good marriage and could save one headed for divorce. Can't get your partner to participate? Read it anyway for more insight into your relationship with a spouse or partner.

i bought this book for my parents as well as for myself. and its a great read, very intelligent and informative and practical (and we tend to be a bit skeptical). i think anyone can benefit from this, or at least walk away with something new.

This is a wonderful book about how to make the best of your relationship better; to love, understand and accept, and how to effectively and lovingly argue. I am not married but found tremendous benefits from this book in my relationship with my boyfriend. Highly recommended!

A great aide for those who don't wish to seek the "counseling" route. What a bonus to find this book, its insight and information all for the price of a paperback!

Revealing and encouraging for those of us who know we sincerely love our spouses and are will to do the work make our marriages work. Thanks for letting us know the warning signs and ways to change our behavior in order to to achieve this! Thank you, thank you, thank you!

This book came recommended from a friend who is also a licensed family counselor. My husband and I have referenced it many times and given it away as gifts. It is easy and fun to read and incredibly useful. We are no where near a "perfect couple" but with the tools in this book I can honestly say that we are closer and more in love than the day we married.

this is not your typical, "oh, what matters in a good marriage is communication, communication, communication" kind of book. its starting point is the quite radical thesis that 69% of the problems that a couple is having are irresolvable--that doesn't mean you are destined to get a divorce! there are things you can do to work on your relationship, if you want to. i like the work sheets and exercises.

one point i didn't like is that the "let your partner influence you" part is dedicated to a heterosexual relationship. one thing i didn't appreciate as much about this book--even though i am in a heterosexual relationship-- is that all the advice kind of assumes a heteronormative standpoint, while explaining those assumptions from a scientific viewpoint. nevertheless, if the book is reworked as a counceling for any kind of couple, it would certainly improve.

Among many things this book provides specifics on communication styles. Not only is it important for couples to understand how they are communicating and healthy ways to do so, but it is important for SINGLE individuals to know this, develop their own skills, and to choose a partner wisely. A must read for ALL and should be included in High School reading requirements before spending countless years in bad relationships.

For the last year I have been traveling to Seattle to train for certification with Jon and Julie Gottman and their staff at The Gottman Institute, and this book is a great introduction to their work and the invaluable research they have done with couples for more than thirty years now. I wish this book and their work were required reading for life. I wish I had known of their work earlier in my life both personally and professionally. This is a book to come back to time and time again. To me it is not only useful for married couples but has such wise tools to learn about for all our relationships. I've read most of his other books and highly recommend them as well, including those on children. If you like the book they also have amazing workshops in Seattle for couples. My parents just went to one for their 45th wedding anniversary and said they still learned a great deal from them!

If I ever get married again I will keep this fantastic book closeby. For the last year I have been traveling to Seattle to train for certification with Jon and Julie Gottman and their staff at The Gottman Institute, and this book is a great introduction to their work and the invaluable research they have done with couples for more than thirty years now. I wish this book and their work were required reading for life. I wish I had known of their work earlier in my life both personally and professionally. This is a book to come back to time and time again. To me it is not only useful for married couples but has such wise tools to learn about for all our relationships. I've read most of his other books and highly recommend them as well, including those on children. If you like the book they also have amazing workshops in Seattle for couples. My parents just went to one for their 45th wedding anniversary and said they still learned a great deal from them!

If I ever get married again I will keep this fantastic book closeby. For the last year I have been traveling to Seattle to train for certification with Jon and Julie Gottman and their staff at The Gottman Institute, and this book is a great introduction to their work and the invaluable research they have done with couples for more than thirty years now. I wish this book and their work were required reading for life. I wish I had known of their work earlier in my life both personally and professionally. This is a book to come back to time and time again. To me it is not only useful for married couples but has such wise tools to learn about for all our relationships. I've read most of his other books and highly recommend them as well, including those on children.

For the last year I have been traveling to Seattle to train for certification with Jon and Julie Gottman and their staff at The Gottman Institute, and this book is a great introduction to their work and the invaluable research they have done with couples for more than thirty years now. I wish this book and their work were required reading for life. I wish I had known of their work earlier in my life both personally and professionally, esp when I was married! This is a book to come back to time and time again. To me it is not only useful for married couples but has such wise tools to learn about for all our relationships. I've read most of his other books and highly recommend them as well, including those on children.

For the last year I have been traveling to Seattle to train for certification with Jon and Julie Gottman and their staff at The Gottman Institute, and this book is a great introduction to their work and the invaluable research they have done with couples for more than thirty years now. I wish this book and their work were required reading for life. I wish I had known of their work earlier in my life both personally and professionally. This is a book to come back to time and time again. To me it is not only useful for married couples but has such wise tools to learn about for all our relationships. I've read most of his other books and highly recommend them as well, including those on children.

This is NOT a self help book. I can tell you that honestly because I don't read self help books. Self help books are generalist pseudo-science made up by so-called motivational gurus like Tony Robbins, Rhonda Byrne (The Secret) and Jack Canfield (Chicken Soup guy). The aforementioned books are mental pablum written by corrupt individuals whose goal is to separate you from your money. They are not experts. Their only accomplishment is to come up with a manipulative technique to sell a new version of snake oil.

If you want to learn more on this subject, read SHAM by Steve Salerno. It isn't a perfect book because he falls down a bit in the proof area, and some of his conclusions are outlandish, but he does give you a lot to think about regarding the self help movement.

John Gottman's book is an educational reference. If you want to be a physicist, you read books by experts in the field of physics. If you want to be a good spouse, you read books on marriage by experts in the field of marriage. It's not self help; it's education.

Make sure you pick your "experts" carefully. John Gray (Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus) is NOT an expert. He got is "PhD" from a diploma mill. The man has no accredited higher education at all. His book is pure, made up, stereotypical garbage. He came up with a catchy title, went on Oprah, and made millions because there are a lot of gullible people out there. Don't be one of them.

Gottman, however, really is an expert. He is one of the best in his field and is recognized as such by his peers. His credentials are legitimate and he wrote a very good book. My marriage was good before I read it. My wife brought it home because, as a family doctor, she often talks to her patients about their relationships and this was part of her overall education. I like improving myself, so I read it too and it helped. My marriage wasn't in need of saving, but fine tuning is always a good idea, so I used the techniques and they work. It helped evolve my marriage from good to great.

I can see how it would help save marriages that were really on the rocks, although I don't have the first hand experience in this regard. What Gottman has to say really resonates about things that you should and should not do in a marriage. On that note, I think people give up on relationships too easily. They become too self absorbed, worry about their own needs and forget the joy to be had in being dedicated to making someone they love happy. Not all marriages can be fixed, but most can.

It doesn't take much to motivate me to stay married, but the one thing that terrifies me more than anything about getting divorced is the thought of some other guy being a stepfather to my children. I am very protective of my kids, and no man will EVER take my place as their father as long as I'm alive. Think about that before you sleep with your secretary.

I have one criticism of Gottman. He's an expert, and he knows it. His book comes across as arrogant, and sometimes the material is dry. Forgive me, but I like to be entertained a little. I accept that you are an expert or I wouldn't be reading your book, so you don't have to keep reminding me. The information is great, but it isn't exactly a page turner. Perhaps he should have done different male and female versions with the same content, but written in different styles. A few metaphorical car chases and explosions couldn't have hurt.

This is a great book! I have read many relationship books and this is clearly the best. It is so easy to read and offers a lot of practical guidance. There are step by step exercises for you and your partner to work on together. Rebuilding and re-aquainting with each other. I found it to be hopeful and reassuring. It has helped me immensely in my relationship. I would highly recommend this book to anyone who is looking for help in your relationship.

My fiancee and I decided to be proactive and visit a psychologist before we had any relationship issues and before we got married. He recommended Gottman to us, and what a fabulous recommendation it was! Reading "Seven Principles" really illustrated with lucidity what it was about my parents' marriage that has always bothered me (contempt from my mother in their arguments) and gave clear steps on how to avoid this and other relationship killers. It was very reaffirming in that it doesn't tell couples not to fight (because how realistic is that?), but teaches them how to fight and how to agree to disagree. My fiancee is in the process of reading it now, and I'm excited for him to finish so we can talk it over. The last principle, in particular, is really great for people who already have solid relationships...it made me excited to get married!

A really excellent book overall, Gottman's writing style is clear and concise!

This book is absolutely essential in the treatment of marriage or couple counseling, as well as can be used by anyone interested in strengthening their own marriage/relationships. It is helpful because it is basic, layed out in a very simplistic manner, and is an easy reader. The book offers concrete instructions for couples on how to improve their closeness, connection, and communication. It is also based on scientific studies thereby offering value and effectiveness of the techniques illustrated in the book. I would highly recommend it for struggling couples, those considering divorce, as well as couples with a good relationship seeking a closer bond.

This author uses common sense and clinical study and marries the 2 together,
He gives simple, thought provoking questions and daily/weekly effective deeds to do. Insightful and effective. We're using it to help others but aNYONE can take a few hints from this even MR and MRS perfectly happy.

great book that I had initially borrowed from my therapist. Was enlighteneing. Made me recognize a lot about myself and my spouse. I recommend it for newleyweds and other couples as well; I myself have been married for 10 years. It can be used preventitively or as a couselling guide or just to provide some insight into what you may be feeling or going through with a significant other. It made me realize my thoughts and actions were not "crazy" but rather common.

I use Dr. Gottman's marriage principles in my private practice with great success. I highly recommend this book.

Reasearch in this book could not be more true. If you both want self help-- here it is. There is not much in this book that can be accomplished alone, it is certainly a book where both parties want to better the relationship.

I am half way through this book and I cannot believe how it has changed my marriage and my outlook on life in general. The principals in this book not only help with marriage problems, but with any problem you may encounter with another person. I thought my marriage was ruined, after reading just the first two chapters, I realized I was totally wrong. As long as you are friends, your marriage is not doomed...there are so many exercises in this book that help you strengthen the bond between you and your husband/wife, some of them are so simple I even said to myself "Duh, why didn't I think of that?" Concentrate on the positives in your marriage and realize that everyone disagrees, we are not all the same...read this book, whether you have a great relationship or not, in fact give it to newlyweds, this book is amazing and a definite marriage saver! I ordered the book and DVD, could not wait for the book, so also ordered the Ebook...you can also get it off of John Goddard's website, the book and DVD for $33, it got here in about 4 days, well worth the price, in fact underpriced in my opinion!!

Very helpful to folks for increasing awareness of their own helpful and non-helpful behaviors in relationship. If you can't find the time to read this material, consider getting a related DVD that covers all the high lights.Making Marriage Work

I really enjoyed reading this book and applying what was written to my own personal life. I would recommend this book to a friend.

A valuable, well-written book. I recommend it to the couple's that I counsel and it's been very helpful---in fact, since I started recommending it, there's no doubt that this book was instrumental in saving at least two marriages that were deeply troubled. I intend to keep recommending it. Pamela D. Blair, Author The Next Fifty Years: A Guide for Women at Mid-Life And Beyond

This book is very insightful. It's great for a husband and wife to read together or separately. It is very easy to read and understand. My husband and I learned a lot about each other and ourselves by reading it.